Timelord flatmates
by lozza1989
Summary: The ninth Doctor, tenth Doctor, eleventh Doctor and the Master are living together as flatmates in this sitcom style fanfic. Is not written in script format. Reviews are welcome so don't forget to leave one.
1. Chapter 1

The one where the timelords move in

Plot: The ninth Doctor, the tenth Doctor, the Eleventh Doctor and the Master are living in a london apartment together and try to act like normal human beings.

Here is a brief description of what kind of personalities our four main characters will be displaying.

The ninth doctor- Nine is the grumpiest of the timelords, he hates it when people make remarks about his ears. He will constantly be getting annoyed by the Master throughout this fic for comedy purposes.

The tenth Doctor- Ten is the one who likes to keep things in order and is the leader of the pack. He is however, easily frightened by horror movies when watching them for the first time.

The Eleventh Doctor-Eleven is the cheerful hyperactive one who treats everyone else like they are his best friends.

The Master-he is the troublemaker of the group who loves to bug Nine and cause chaos where ever he goes.

The end of each chapter will also feature a small summary of what is to come in the next chapter, so let's get on with the story and reviews are welcome so if you leave a review stating your opinion then I will be most greatful.

Now to the story folks.

The four timelords all stood in the spacious London apartment they had just moved into to, admiring the paintwork that had been left by the previous owners.

"So, what do we all think then?" Ten asked, turning to his other incarnations and the Master "pretty roomy huh?"

"It's alright" Nine shrugged, his arms folded across his leather jacket. Ten smiled and walked into the living room, the other three followed behind.

"How many rooms are there?" Eleven asked.

"Four, so we won't have to share with anybody, everybody gets there own room" Ten announced "now, I am going to let you all choose your own rooms but I want no fighting about who gets the biggest room ok." They all agreed on that before going to pick their own rooms and Ten was amazingly suprised that no one was bickering over who was having the biggest room. After the room choosing, the guys decided to unpack their stuff and make the Aparmtent feel more homely instead of empty. Nine was in a bad mood because the Master was in one of his "let's annoy Doctor number nine" mood.

"I swear, if you ever shove that feather duster in my face again, I will stick it where the sun doesn't shine" Nine growled as the Master kept constantly tickling him in the face with a feather duster.

"Master, can you please stop annoying Doctor Nine and help out with the unpacking" Ten told him sternly.

"On one condition though" the Master replied "I get to decorate my own room in the most bizzare way." Ten looked at Master in a weird way and asked in what kind of bizzare way.

"Ahhh, you'll find out once it's done and if you'll let me" the Master said in a sing song voice "so, what do you say?"

"Fine, but I don't want anything vulgar painted on your walls, ok?" Ten asked.

"You have my word, besides, I've already got a good idea on how i'm going to decorate my room" the Master said before chuckling in a sinister manner. Nine rolled his eyes, Ten raised an eyebrow and Eleven seemed interested.

"How are you going to decorate your room?" he asked with deep interest.

"You'll find out once I've finished" the Master replied. Eleven stood up, walked over to Ten and asked him if he and Nine could decorate their rooms aswell.

"I don't see why not, I'll decorate my room aswell" Ten replied "but first, we must unpack." Hours later, they had all unpacked and finished decorating their rooms, except for the Master who had spend hours doing his room up.

"What is he doing in there?" Nine asked "building a statue of himself?"

"I wouldn't put it past him" Ten replied "it's the kind of thing the Master would pull off, so you could be right." After another hour of waiting, the Master emerged from his room, wearing paint overalls and face covered in paint.

"Have you finished then?" Nine asked "you've been in there for hours." The Master grinned and nodded before telling the other three to take a look at his handy work.

"Welcome to the Master's crib" he announced as they all stepped in to take a look at his decorated room. He had covered the walls and ceiling with "vote Saxon" posters and images of the Toclafane, except for the wall opposite where his bed was. He had painted a large image of himself on that wall.

"So" he asked, looking at the other three "what do you think?"

"You are insane" Ten commented.

"I know" the Master replied with a satisfied smirk "it's my best handy work, don't you think?"

"Why the hell have you painted an image of yourself?" Nine asked.

"So I can look at my gorgeous self when I wake in the mornings" the Master replied "so, do I get to see how you three did up your rooms?"

"Oh, you can look at mine first" Eleven yelled as he bounded out of the Master's room and into his own room. The others followed after him to take a look at how he had decorated his room.

"Ta-da" he sang as he showed off his Bow-tie shrine and the multiple fezs painted all over the walls.

"Do you have a bow-tie fetish or something?" Nine asked, nodding at the home made Bow-tie shrine.

"Hey, bow ties are cool" Eleven protested "as are fezzes, ok Ten, let's see your room." The four timelords then went to have a look at Ten's room. He had painted his walls blue and painted little sonic screwdrivers and tardises on them.

"Nice" Eleven said in awe "this room is cool." They then went to see what Nine had done with his room and he had painted bananas on the walls.

"Is this is it?" the Master asked with a hint of dissapointment "walls covered in bananas."

"Bananas are good" Nine replied "I was covering my walls in the thing that I like and I like bananas." They then went back into the front room and sat down on the sofa.

"Ok, what shall we do now?" Ten asked "how about we order a pizza and rent a horror movie?" They all liked the sound of that idea, so Ten ordered a cheese pizza and rented Nightmare on Elm street as he and the others had never seen it before. An hour had passed into the film, Doctors Ten and Eleven were hugging each other in fear and Nine looked bored. The Master however, was enjoying the movie.

"I love this guy" he said as Freddy Krueger came onto the screen "he is amazing, he is the best horror movie character ever to exist. I want a sweater like his and that razor glove thing. Infact, I'm going to dress up as Freddy krueger for halloween this year." A really scary part came on, both Ten and Eleven shrieked like girls before hugging each other. Nine looked at how they were reacting and rolled his eyes.

"Take a chill pill guys, it's only a movie" he said with a sigh.

"Yeah" the Master added with a menacing look on his face "it's just a movie, or is it?" He then switched on a torch, put it close to his face and did an evil expression before laughing insanely.

"Will you stop it, you're not scaring us" Ten barked as he let go of Eleven "only the Freddy Krueger guy is scaring us."

"But you're the one who rented it" the Master pointed out.

"I didn't know it was going to be this scary" Ten replied.

"You sir, are a wuss" the Master said, patting Ten on the back before turning his eyes to the television screen. After the movie had finished, the timelords had gone to bed and just has Ten was about to doze off, he heard a familiar song from outside his bedroom door.

"One, two, Freddy's coming for you." Ten gasped and grabbed his sheets in fear as the song continued.

"Three, four, better lock your door, five six, grab your crucifix." Ten yelped and dived under the duvet.

"Seven eight, gonna stay up late, nine, ten, never sleep again." Ten was now shivering in fear under the duvet whilst outside the bedroom door, the Master snickered to himself before retreating into his own room, hoping that he had scared Ten out of his wits.

Coming up in the next Chapter, Nine tries to make pancakes, Ten and Eleven go to a market sale and the Master becomes addicted to Sonic the Hedgehog. That's all to come in the next chapter.

Hope you liked it so far and please, please leave some feedback, I'd really appreciate it. That's all for now folks.


	2. The one with the sega

The one with the sega

It was the morning after the timelords had moved in and Ten looked like he hadn't got much sleep the night before.

"What's wrong with you?" Eleven asked "you look like you've had a big fright."

"Someone was stood outside my bedroom door last night, singing the Freddy krueger song" Ten replied "it really scared me."

"Well who knows, maybe Freddy krueger does exist after all" the Master suggested "maybe he crawled out of the tv set, stood outside your bedroom door and sang that song before going home to put his feet up." The three Doctors glared at him in response and then Nine pointed out that Freddy krueger was a fictional character. The Master only smirked in response.

"So, what do you guys fancy doing today, I've heard there's a market sale on down town, does anyone fancy coming?" Ten asked.

"I do" Eleven piped up eagerly.

"Ok" Ten replied then turning to Nine and the Master "do you two fancy coming along?"

"No, I hate market sales" Nine responded "those stupid apes selling worthless junk."

"ok" Ten said "so Master,want to come along?"

"Oh I'd love too but I think I'll stay in today, keep Nine companion" the Master grinned, putting his arm around Nine's shoulder.

"Ok" Ten said, getting up from the sofa "come on Eleven, let's go to the market." Eleven stood up from the sofa and joined Ten.

"You're not going to leave me with this lunatic are you?" Nine asked, gesturing to the Master who was smirking at him.

"Only if he promises to behave" Ten said "and he is going to behave, isn't he?." The Master looked at Ten, smiled and did an Angel pose.

"Ok, we'll be back in a couple of hours" Ten said before he and Eleven let the apartment. The Master grinned evily and turned his attention back to Nine.

"So, big ears, what do you fancy doing today?" he asked.

"Nothign with you" Nine replied, standing up from the sofa and heading into the kitchen "I'm going to make some pancakes."

"Ooooh, can I join in?" the Master asked eagerly and jumping up from the sofa. Nine turned around and glared at him.

"I'll let you join in when they figure out a cure for death for the human race" Nine responded in sarcasm.

"That can be arranged if you so wish it" the Master replied in the same manner. Nine sighed and rubbed his temples in frustration.

"Look, I'm going to make pancakes, can you just try and not bug me today?"Nine asked. The Master grinned and nodded before putting on a frown.

"But what am I supposed to do?" he asked.

"I don't know, go and watch the telly or something" Nine said.

"Ok, will do, have fun making those pancakes" the Master said before doing a little wave and going into the room to watch the telly. As Nine started preparing all the stuff, he heard the theme tune to Balamory coming from the front room.

"Ok, now let's see what I need" he mumbled as he read the cookery book "uh huh, ok, got those right here, yeah." He then started pouring the ingedients he needed into the baking bowl, unaware that someone was sneaking up behind him, ready the strike. Just as he was about to crack the last egg, a hand grabbed his shoulder, followed by a very loud "boo." Nine turned around to see the Master stood behind him, wearing a Tinky winky mask.

"Is that supposed to scare me?" he asked as he yanked the Tinky winky mask of the Master's face.

"I was hoping it would" the Master replied. Nine chuffed and rolled his eyes.

"Do you really think a plastic teletubbie mask would scare me?" he asked "because it's going to take alot more than a stupid teletubbie mask to scare me."

"What about a Freddy Krueger mask?" the Master asked.

"Get out of the kitchen before I hurt you" Nine said dangerously. The Master starting pretending to be really scared before laughing insanely. Nine raised his eyebrows at him, so he left the kitchen.

Thirty minutes later, the pancake was nearly done, all Nine needed to do now was the tossing. The Master had re-entered the kitchen and Nine let out an annoyed sigh.

"What have you come to bug me about this time?" he asked. The Master looked at Nine in mock horror.

"Me, come to bug you, I wouldn't even dare" the Master replied "I just came in here to get a drink." He then took a cola can from the fridge. Nine gave the pancake one last toss and it went flying through the air, landing on the Master's head. This time, he was annoyed.

"You sir, are going to die" he announced before taking out his laser screwdriver and aiming it at Nine who simply walked over to him and yanked it from his hands.

"That will be quite enough of that thankyou" he said then pulling the Pancake of the Master's head. Just then, Ten and Eleven entered the apartment after being to the market to show off what they had bought.

"Check this out" Eleven said as he pulled out a sega from his plastic carrier bag "twenty pounds."

"It was my idea to buy it" Ten replied with a grin "isn't it awesome?"

"What is it?" Nine asked as he studied it.

"It's called a Sega master system" Ten replied. The Master looked as though Chrismtas had come early.

"They name a games console after me?" he asked, acting all dramatic "my, arn't I special?" He then grabbed hold of the sega and plugged it in the back of the telly.

"It also has a game built into it" Ten said "called Sonic the hedgehog which Is a brilliant name because that is the name of my screwdriver, Sonic."

"Well I am going to play it, as this sega is mine now" the Master declared then switching it on. The sega logo came onto the screen, then followed by a picture of Sonic the hedgehog waglling his finger and the press start flashing under the image. The Master pressed the start button and the game began.

"So, what did you do today?" Ten asked Nine as the Master played on the sega, his eyes glued to the tv screen.

"I attempted to make some pancakes but it wasn't very succesful" Nine replied.

"Yeah, he tossed one and it landed on my head" the Master said, not taking his eyes off the screen.

"It was an accident" Nine retaliated.

"Shhhhhhhhhh, the Master is playing video games" the Master said, his eyes still fixed on the tv screen. Nine rolled his eyes and turned to his other two incarnations.

"So, was it busy at the market then?" he asked as they went into the kitchen.

"A little bit, I accidently walked into an old lady" Eleven replied "I apologized, but she didn't take it very well." Ten nodded in agreement and said that she had whacked him with her handbag.

"She must have been really hacked off if she didn't accept your apolog then" said Nine. An hour later, the three Doctors where watching the Master playing on Sonic the hedgehog and he was now up to the scrapbrain level.

"Didn't you get killed during the game?" Ten asked "because I heard that some of the levels on there can be quite difficult."

"I did die twenty times on the Labyrinth zone" the Master replied "but I still carried on until I got the hang of it and now I'm up to the really cool level." Half an hour had passed and the Master was now up to the final level, a look of concentration glued to his face as he sped through the Skybase zone.

"Someone must really love this game" Ten commented.

"Shut up, I'm winning" the Master snapped, not taking his eyes off the screen. After another thirty minutes of attempting to complete the final zone, the Master had finally completed the game.

"I am the champion" he sang as he stood up, arms raised in the air before sitting back down again "I'm going to play it again." Hours had gone by and it was now one in the morning. The Doctors were woken up by the familiar insane laughter, so they peeked out of their bedrom doors to find the Master still playing on Sonic the Hedgehog, grinning insanely.

"This, is going to be a long night" Ten commented.

Coming up in chapter 3, the timelords go shopping at Homebase and the Master does what he does best, causes havoc. That's all to come next.


	3. The one where they go shopping

The one where they go shopping

A week had past since the four timelords had moved in and they were beginning to feel at home, although Ten thought that it needed something else to make it feel more homely.

"What we need is a coffee table" he suggested "it will look good in the front room."

"Why do we need a coffee table?" nine asked, raising his eyebrow in confusion.

"So we can put our cups of coffee on" ten replied "it's better than having to put them by our feet and then accidentally kicking them over." Eleven sauntered over to ten and asked him where he was intending on getting a coffee table from.

"They've got some really nice ones in Homebase, so I'd figure the four of us will go today and buy a coffee table" ten suggested.

"Oh, can we get a trampoline too?" the Master asked. Ten gave him a disapproving look.

"The flat isn't big enough" he stated "so no trampolines."

"I was going to put it in my room" the Master replied before sticking his tongue out ten who just glared back at him.

"Still no room" ten implied "OK gang, there's a bus due in thirty minutes, we can catch that one if we hurry up." About fifteen minutes later, the four timelords were stood at a bus stop waiting for the bus.

"It shouldn't be too long now" ten said, checking his watch. About ten minutes later, a double decker bus arrived and the timelords got on. The ground floor was full so they had to sit up on the second level but that was packed also, except for the back seats so they sat there.

"So how long will it take to get there then?" eleven asked. Ten said that it would take about twenty minutes or so for the bus to arrive at Homebase.

"I hate busy buses" nine complained "and the worst thing I hate about busy buses is that the bus driver still lets other people on when the bus is already full." The bus had stopped at another stop to let some more people on and they had come to sit upstairs. It was five chavs, three boys and two girls.

"See what I mean" nine pointed out as the chavs came to sit near the timelords. One chav had given nine the evils.

"Are you talking about us?" he asked. Nine mumbled something which sounded like "stupid chav ape."

"Are you dissing us mate?" the same chav asked.

"Don't mind him" the Master told the chav "he was dropped on his head at birth." Nine gave the Master the evil look.

"You're don't hang around with these losers do you?" that same chav asked.

"Got no choice" the Master replied "we all come from the same place." The chavs looked confused but simply shook it off.

"Well, allow us to introduce ourselves, my name is Ziggy and this is my crew Jimbo, Arnie, Kimba and Zoe" Ziggy said "and what do they call you mate?"

"My name is Freddy" the Master replied.

"Freddy what?" Ziggy asked.

"Krueger" the Master replied with a grin "my name is Freddy krueger." The three Doctors looked at him in a weird way.

"Awesome name mate" Jimbo pointed out "so tell us Freddy, where are you and your crew going?"

"Homebase, Lucifer here wants to buy a coffee table" the Master implied, patting ten on the shoulder.

"Who are you calling Lucifer, Mr. Krueger?" ten asked, glaring at his fellow timelord. The chavs looked confused.

"Oh pay no attention to Lucifer, he has issues" the Master said, pattign ten on the head this time "isn't that right?." Ten shoved the Master's arm out of the way and told him to behave himself.

"So, what are your other two mates called then?" Ziggy asked.

"This fella here is called Dipsy" the Master said, pointing at Eleven "and this fine gentlemen here is called Elephant, because of his ears." Both nine and eleven looked horrified and the chavs burst out laughing.

"Nice names" Kimba chuckled. The Master grinned and turned to the three Doctors.

"Well, wasn't that nice of our new friends to compliment on how nice your names where?" he asked. He waited for a response, but all he got was three evil glares. When the bus arrived at there stop, the Master bid goodbye to the chavs before joining the other three outside Homebase.

"I swear, if you ever call us by those stupid names again, I will strangle you" nine growled in annoyance.

"Jeez, take a chill pill, I was just having abit of fun" the Master retorted.

"OK, we're not here to fight, we are here to buy a new coffee table" ten implied "so can we all just behave ourselves when we're in store please, thank you." Both nine and eleven nodded.

"Yes, your majesty" the Master said, before doing a bow. Ten then placed his hands in the pockets of his brown overcoat and walked into the big Homebase store with the other three timelords sauntering behind.

"Ok, now all we need to do is find the coffee tables" ten implied.

"Time to cause some mayhem" the Master whispered with an evil grin before sneaking off from the group. Unfortunately, they hadn't noticed and assumed he was still with them so they followed ten around the store in search of he coffee tables.

"So what kind of coffee table are you planning on getting then?" eleven asked as he jogged along side ten.

"I was hoping on purchasing a really trendy one" ten said.

"I like coffee tables, coffee tables are cool" eleven pointed out.

"What else do you find cool?" nine asked with a hint of sarcasm in his tone.

"Bow ties, fezes, remote control cars, smarties, cowboy hats, stilettos, DVD players, jammy dodgers, bunk beds, family guy, south park, the Simpson and teddy bears" eleven replied. Nine raised his eyebrow but ten didn't say anything as he was too busy trying to find the coffee tables.

"Goodness me, this place is very big isn't it, it could take us forever to find the coffee tables" he implied. They were walking around for about ten minutes until they finally found the coffee tables.

"Wow, there's many choices, I can't decide" said ten. His other two incarnations joined him to have a look.

"I think that one would look good in our front room" eleven said, pointing at a light brown one with metal legs.

"I agree with eleven on that one" nine pointed out "it is a really nice looking coffee table."

"What do you think Master?" ten asked, turning around and realizing that the Master was no longer with the group "Damn it."

"Where did he go?" eleven asked "I thought he was right behind us."

"I don't know, but we need to find him before he causes any damage" ten informed. Elsewhere in the store, the Master was bouncing up and down on a trampoline when a fat guy in a suit walked up to him.

"Are you going to buy that?" he asked.

"No" the Master replied as he bounced up and down then doing a star jump.

"Then why are you bouncing on it then?" the fat guy asked.

"Duh, because it's a trampoline and that's what you do on a trampoline" the Master pointed out. The fat guy sighed in annoyance and rubbed his temples.

"Sir, if you're not going to buy that trampoline, then I'm going to have to ask you to get off" the fat guy informed. The Master stopped bouncing and looked at the fat guy, arms folded.

"You can't tell me what to do, I am the Master" he retorted.

"Well I am the Manager and I am telling you to get off that trampoline now" the fat guy replied.

"Spoil sport" the Master said as he got off the trampoline then walking over to the Manager and repeatedly slapping him on the boald patch on his head.

" Stop that now or else I'm going to have to call security" the Manager spat.

"OK" the Master replied as he stopped "but you're going to have to catch me first." He then laughed his head off, got on a bike that was suited for a ten year old and began peddling away as fast as he could.

Meanwhile, the other three timelords were still looking for the Master, but they had no luck in finding him.

"It's a big store and he could be anywhere " eleven pointed out.

"I know. Just look for any sign of destruction and then you'll know that he's close by" ten informed

They continued searching when they saw a bunch of sofas up in flames and some members of staff putting them out with fire extinguishers.

"What's happened here?" ten asked.

"Some crazy guy on a kids bike torched them" a geeky man said.

"What did this crazy guy look like?" ten asked,

"Tall, had brown hair and was wearing a black suit and tie" the geek informed.

"Sounds like the Master all right" eleven pointed out "he must have been here and set fire to those sofas."

"Is this guy always this crazy?" the geek asked.

"Oh yeah, he makes horses crazy, kills puppies, hides remotes, really sick shit" ten replied "which way did he go?"

"Err, that way" the geek said, pointing in the direction where the Master had gone.

"Right, thank you" ten said before heading off in that direction, his other incarnations following behind him.

Somewhere in the store, the Master was hiding in the gent's toilets, giggling to himself as he thought of the destruction he had caused. He had set fire to some sofas, stole a man's wallet, tipped over a shelve full of footballs, broke some glass cabinets, wrote obscene comments on the display board and knocked over a few people when he was peddling on that child's bike. Now he was hiding in the gent's toilets and was thinking of the big finale to all his chaos.

"What can I do" he muttered to himself as he looked around the toilet for any ideas until he got the most brilliant idea ever.

"Now that does sound like a good idea" he cheered before he stood up and walked into one of the cubicles. The Master then blocked all the toilets with toilet paper before flushing them all. He then put all the plugs in the plug holes in the sinks and turned the taps on before slinking out of the gents, the toilets overflowing and the taps left running.

The three Doctors had spent almost an hour trying to find the Master until they eventually found him, holed up in a garden shed.

"Where the hell have you been?" ten asked "we've been looking everywhere for you."

"Really, why I'm honoured" the Master said, putting his hand on his chest. Ten glared at him and raised an eyebrow.

"Do you want me to come out?" the Master asked. Ten raised his eyebrow again so the Master stepped out of the shed.

"Have you seen the damage that you've caused?" ten asked.

"Yes" the Master replied "wait until you see what I've done for the grand finale." Suddenly there was a rumbling noise and before ten could react, a stream of water came rushing towards them.

"EVERYBODY RUN" ten screamed.

One hour later, the timelords where back in the their flat.

"Well that was a fun trip out wasn't it?" the Master inquired.

"Are you insane, you caused a lot of damage and you flooded the entire store" ten barked.

"I know" the Master replied with a grin "so, where shall we shop at next, how about Ikea?." Ten Groaned and buried his face in his hands.

Coming up in the next chapter, there is a power cut and the timelords have to entertain themselves without electricity, that's all to come next.


	4. The one where there's a powercut

The one where there's a power cut

It had been three days since the incident at Homebase and Ten was trying to put all of it behind him, although he did get occasional flashbacks of a river of water rushing through the store after the Master had blocked up all the toilets, flushed them, then left the taps running, causing a major flood which destroyed the store.

It was a Saturday evening, both Nine and Eleven watched as Ten and the Master competed against each other on guitar hero. Eleven was holding a notepad, writing down the scores they were both getting.

"I'm getting the highest score" Ten yelled "look at me go. I'm am so going to win this."

"In your dreams" the Master scoffed "everyone knows I rock at this game and that I am going to win this."

"According to my scoreboard, Ten has the highest score, you're behind by five points" Eleven stated. The Master growled and declared that he was going to get the highest score on the next round.

"I'd like to see you try, you're rubbish at this game" Nine pointed out. Just as the master was about to throttle him, the apartment was engulfed in darkness and they all yelled in surprise.

"What's going on?" Eleven yelled "who killed the lights."

"Oh oh, maybe we forgot to pay the electrical bill and now they've cut us off until we pay it" the Master suggested.

"Just relax everybody, we've had a power cut" Ten pointed out "so it should be back on pretty soon." Eleven walked up to the window and peered out of it behind the curtain.

"He's right, the whole streets out" he said "but I wonder how long it will be until the electric comes back on."

"Who knows" the Master replied "it could be hours, days, months, years, maybe it will be like this forever, eternal darkness,ha ha ha." Ten gave the Master a disapproving look and told the others that it might take a few hours or until the next day until the electricity comes back on.

"So what are we supposed to do until then?" nine asked "sit here like fools."

"No, we can still have fun, we can play games or something" Ten suggested "that way none of us will be bored."

"That sounds like fun" said the Master "but first I need to write down a few names my people to kill list and I've got some basic ideas of who I'm going to add."

"Who are those people then?" Eleven asked.

"Justin bieber, Miley Cyrus, Jedward, that opera singing guy from the go compare commercials and Paris Hilton. Those people annoy me to hell and they all must die" the Master said in a sinister tone. Ten looked creeped out but shook it off before telling everyone that they needed to find the torches.

"How are we supposed to find the bloody torches when it's pitch black?" nine asked.

"I think there's a box of them in the broom cupboard" Eleven pointed out "but if I can just feel my way around the apartment, then maybe I can find it." He then started feeling his way around the apartment to try and find the broom cupboard, he kept bumping into things a few times, like the kitchen table, a few chairs and he almost tripped over the dustbin, but he managed to locate the broom cupboard.

"I think I've found it" he called to the others "I'm going in." The others listened as the sound of mops and brooms toppled over, clanking against the ground.

"I'm OK" Eleven replied.

"Is there a box of torches in there?" Ten asked.

"It's quire dark so it's very hard to see, but hang on a minute, I think I see something." A couple of minutes later, Eleven emerged from the cupboard, holding a torch and carrying a box of them.

"I knew there was a box of torches in there" he said as the other three picked up a torch each and switched them on.

"So, who fancies a game of scrabble?" Ten asked "I think we have that game somewhere." he then went to try and find it, but had no luck so instead, came out with something else.

"I couldn't find scrabble, but look what else I found" he announced, carrying a small owl like creature with cat ears.

"What is that?" Nine asked.

"It's a furby" said Ten "I found it in the back of my bedroom cupboard. I thought we should see what it does."

"Don't tell me you bought that thing with you when we moved here?" Nine asked. Ten shook his head and told his previous incarnation that whoever owned it must have left it behind. He then tipped it upside down and flicked it onto the on switch before setting it down on the table just as the furby moved it's eyes and began to speak.

"u-nye-boh-do?" it spoke. Eleven jumped back in fear, Nine rolled his eyes, the Master started laughing and Ten was looking at the furby with a big grin on his face.

"It spoke, it spoke in another language" Eleven said, pointing a shaking finger at the furby who spoke again.

"U-nye-noh-lah" it said.

"What did it say, I can't understand it's evil language" Eleven said. Ten took out the furby translator book he had found with it and flicked through the pages to find the meaning of the word.

"Ah ha, here it is, it translates as show me a dance" Ten replied "I think it wants us to dance"

"Well go and ask it then" Nine replied. Ten then walked up to the furby and put his face close to it.

"Do you want us to dance, because we might have a bit of trouble because as you can see, we've had a power cut and I think it will be quite difficult to dance when it's dark and the only light we've got are the lights from the torches" he said to the furby.

"Doo-Dah" the furby replied. Ten flicked through the pages of the translator booklet before he turned to the other three.

"It wants us to dance" he told them.

"No way am I dancing for a toy" Nine spat "a toy cannot order us about."

"I knew that thing was evil" Eleven pointed out "it's trying to conquer our lives and then eventually, it will takeover the world and enslave the human race."

"Now that's my job" the Master pointed out "I'm not going to stand here while a toy does all that stuff that I'm supposed to do." He then marched up to the furby and poked it in the chest.

"Listen here you piece of fur and plastic, don't think you can get away with ruling the world because that's my job, you got it. I am the Master and you will obey me" he said. There was a few minutes of silence before the furby answered back.

"Boo" it said.

"What did it say this time?" Nine asked. Ten took out his booklet again and searched for the English translation of that word.

"It said no" said Ten. The Master turned around to face the furby again.

"How dare you refuse to obey me" he said to it " as for that, you will suffer a most painful death for your actions." The Master then picked up the furby, walked up to the window, opened the window and dangled the furby by it's ears.

"Any last words you pathetic creature?" The Master asked it "before I toss you to your death?"

"U-nye-loo-lay-doo?" the furby said.

"It said do you want to play?" Ten translated.

"I'm sorry, but this isn't playtime" the Master told it "it's death time." He then tossed the furby out of the window and they could hear it, plummeting to it's doom before a man's voice from outside said "ow, what the... hey, a free furby."

An hour had past by and the power still hadn't come back on. The four time lords where playing a game of connect four.

"Now we must get four of the same colors in a row, but watch out as your opponent can block your path with their colors" Ten told them "now I want a nice clean game, no cheating and no arguing, do I make myself clear."

"Yes" the other three said at the same time. They then played connect four for the next hour until they got bored and the power still hadn't come back on.

"This is stupid" Nine complained "it's been two hours and the power still hasn't come back on. How much longer do we have to sit here for until we have some light."

"We've got to be patient and wait for the lights to come back on" said Ten.

"Well it better come back on soon, because I've still got to beat you on guitar hero" the Master told him.

"Technically, I was winning because you were behind by like five points before the power went out" Ten indicated.

"Well, I will still beat you on the next round" the Master replied "because the next round is mine to win." Ten rolled his eyes and put on a "yeah right" expression before saying that he was the ultimate guitar hero champion and that no one could defeat him.

"Well, we'll see about that won't we on the next round" the Master told him "you may have won the first two rounds, but the other rounds are mine to beat." Another hour had past by and the power had finally come back on.

"Finally, after three bloody hours, we finally have light" Nine said in sarcasm. Eleven looked at the clock on the kitchen wall and saw that it was past one in the morning.

"Blimey, it's late, we should turn in" he said.

"Fine, but I am finishing you off at guitar hero first thing" the Master told Ten.

"Yeah yeah, whatever" Ten replied, gesturing the W sign with his fingers. The Master walked backwards into his room, continuously shaking his fist at Ten before he shut the door. The three doctors also went to bed and as soon as Ten fell asleep, he had the most bizarre dream ever.

He was stood outside his Tardis when he heard someone calling out to him.

"Doctor, doctor." He looked up and saw a figure with long blonde hair, running to him.

"Rose, rose is that you?" he asked.

"Dooooooooooooooctor" the blonde screamed, running towards him. A grin spread across Ten's face as he ran towards the figure.

"Rose, is that really you?" he yelled.

"Yes doctor, it is me, your beloved Rose Tyler, I have finally returned" the blonde said. Ten grinned even more and ran faster towards the on coming blonde figure. When he finally got up closer, he yelled in horror. It wasn't Rose, it was the Master in a blonde wig, that was Ten woke up.

"Phew, at least that never happened for real" he said before flopping back down on the bed again "that was the strangest dream I ever had."

Coming up next, a new family move into the apartment below and the timelords get invited to their housewarming party. It also marks the debut of Charlene and Emily Mitchell, two young sisters who will be appearing now and again throughout the story. that's all to come next.


	5. The one with the party

The one with the party

Nine was in the kitchen making himself some coffee listening to his two future incarnations having a conversation.

"Did you hear all that noise coming from the apartment below this morning?" Eleven asked "what's going on down there?."

"I think there's a family moving in downstairs, I think there's a man, a woman and two little girls" Ten replied "maybe we should all go round later and say hello." Nine sighed as he put two teaspoons of sugar into his coffee.

"What's the matter with you?" Ten asked his previous incarnation.

"I hope these new downstairs neighbours aren't going to be a nuisance" Nine replied. Ten chuckled and reassured him that they might be all right if they were a family with two young children. Nine nodded and went to finish making his coffee when he felt a pair of hands clamp over his eyes.

"Guess who?"

"Master, take your hands away from my eyes right now" Nine barked. The Master pulled his hands away from Nine's face before sitting on the kitchen table.

"So, what are you guys talking about?" he asked "because I was in the front room and I heard you guys having a conversation."

"We we're talking about that new family that's moving in and that we should go over later and say hello" Ten explained.

"Sounds interesting" the Master replied "what time should we call round then. I know, you three keep them distracted while I sneak in and let of fire crackers." Ten gave the Master a stern look and cocked his eyebrow.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" he asked, feigning innocence.

"I don't think that's going to go down very well" Ten replied "now, if we all go and say hello to our new neighbours, will you behave yourself?." The Master nodded and did an Angel pose before picking up the newspaper and reading in.

"Oh, listen to this, a fat woman got stuck in an elevator because she was too fat to squeeze through the doors, so they had rub soap down the sides to pull her out" he read aloud "well, stupid woman shouldn't have taken the elevator in the first place, should have taken the stairs, at least she would have gotten some exercise."

Later that morning, the four timelords went to the apartment below theirs to say hello to the new family. Ten knocked on the door and a stocky looking man answered it.

"Hello, we are the four guys who live in the apartment above, we just thought we'd pop round and say hello" Ten greeted.

"Nice to meet you, would you like to come in?" the man asked. The four walked into the apartment and the man introduced himself and his wife who was sat on the sofa, unpacking some boxes.

"I'm James Mitchell and this is my wife, Denise" he said. Denise offered the four time lords a cup of coffee.

"Oh that sounds lovely Mrs. M" said Ten "could you make mine two sugars, thank you."

"No coffee for me thanks, but I'll have a cup of tea" said Eleven "A cup of tea is cool."

"What about you sir?" she asked the Master who was randomly picking up stuff from the boxes, looking at them and then putting them back "would you like a coffee or a cup of tea."

"Do you have anything that's more, energizing, like red bull?" the Master asked.

"No I'm afraid we don't" said Denise.

"Well, on that case I'll think I'll pass on the coffee and tea" the Master replied. A little while later, they were joined by two you girls who came running into the front room.

"Are these your daughters?" Ten asked.

"Yes, this is Charlene and Emily" James said. Charlene was the oldest daughter, she was ten years old with long blonde hair flowing all way down her back and she had it tied up in a pony tail. Emily was the youngest, she was eight years old with shoulder length mousy brown hair and she had her hair down with a headband in it.

"Who are these four men daddy?" Emily asked, staring at the four timelords who were sat together on the sofa.

"They live in the apartment above us" James told her. Emily nodded and ran off, followed by her sister.

"So, have you fellas been living around here for long?" Denise asked.

"Only for a few weeks" said Ten "it's pretty quiet around here mostly but we do get the odd moan from the old lady next door, complaining about the slightest noise we make." The three Doctors started to laugh and James noticed that there was only three of them sat on the sofa.

"Wasn't there four of you that came?" he asked "because, I think your friend has gone for a wonder somewhere." The Doctors looked and saw that the place where the Master had been sitting was now empty.

"Not again" Ten groaned "he always does this, wonders off somewhere and causes trouble. You know, just the other day, we went to homebase to buy a coffee table, he sneaked off and ended up flooding the entire store."

Meanwhile, the Master was wondering around the apartment when he found the two girls in their room, setting up a dance mat set. Emily was the first one to notice him lurking around and she asked him what he was doing.

"Oh, I'm just having a look around your new apartment" he replied "tell me, how would you two girls like to compete in a dance off, I see you've got your dance mat all set up."

"Are you saying that you want to compete against us in a dance off?" Charlene asked, arms folded. The Master chuckled and ruffled her hair.

"That's the plan little girl" he replied before kicking off his shoes and standing on one of the dance mats "so, who wants to challenge me first?"

The Mitchells and the three Doctors where still in the front room. James was telling them about the house-warming party they were having later this evening.

"Maybe you four should come along" Denise suggested "we've invited quite a few people in the building. I thought it was a good idea to get to know our neighbours."

"Well that sounds lovely" Ten said as he and the other two stood up "well, we best find were our friend has got to and then head back to get ready for the party." They then went to look for the Master until they found him, playing on the dance-mats with Emily. Ten walked into the girl's bedroom and tapped him on the shoulder.

"We're going now" Ten told him "put your shoes back on."

"But I was about to win" the Master complained "you spoil sport."

"Well, we're coming back later because they're throwing a house-warming party" Ten replied "but I don't want any trouble of you. I don't thing they need you flooding the place or turning Charlene and Emily into pensioners with your laser screwdriver."

Later that evening, the four time lords were getting ready for the party.

"I wonder if it will like a children's party, maybe we'll get to play pass the parcel or music statues. I hope we get to dance to the hokey pokey, well if not, I'll get them started up" the Master said "wonder if we'll get to play spin the bottle, that will be a laugh, then I could dare Nine walk all the way to Mcdonalds and back, wearing a pair of fairy wings and a tiara, oh and a tutu."

"I will kill you if you make me do that" Nine hissed. About an hour later, the timelords were now at the party, plus there were a few other people there too. There wasn't much going off and the Master was already bored, Nine seemed fed up too but Ten and Eleven seemed to be enjoying them selves. Ten was talking to two young girls in their twenties and Eleven was teaching Charlene and Emily how to do the drunken giraffe dance.

"It's so dead around here" the Master whispered to Nine "time to lighten things up a little." before Nine could stop him, the master stood up on the chair and whistled to get the other people's attention.

"You guys, this party is so dull, it's more like a funeral than a real party. So, I was suggested that we liven things up a little if we had a game of dares" the Master told them all "OK, now everybody sit in a circle and let's liven things up around here."

An hour had passed by and they were still playing spin the bottle. The Master was getting everybody to do some really unusual dares. First off, he dared Ten to doing a werewolf impression then afterwards daring Eleven to declare his undying love to the young girl sat next to him, he dared James to wear some lipstick. He even dared Charlene to kiss a boy who was round about her age.

"Now, who shall I pick for my next dare" the Master said, his eyes scanning the circle of people until they came next on Nine "bingo. OK Nine, I dare you to walk all the way to McDonalds and back, wearing this tiara, these lovely glittery fairy wings and this sparkly pink tutu" the Master told him before tossing the three items he required him to wear.

"You can't be serious" Nine barked "you lunatic." The Master however was mocking a yawn, indicating that he wanted him to get on with it, so reluctantly, Nine put on the tiara, the fairy wings and the tutu before heading to the front door.

"Oh, and don't forget this" the Master said, handing him a plastic fairy wand. Nine grumbled and stomped out the front door. He returned half and hour later, looking extremely annoyed.

"Hello there fairy princess, how was it?" the Master asked him.

"You are the most annoying person I have ever met" Nine growled. Both Charlene and Emily giggled as he was still wearing the wings, tiara and tutu.

"Can I take these of now, I look stupid" he demanded.

"I can't see why not, you did the dare, so yeah you can now take them off" the Master said with a grin.

A couple of hours had gone by and the party had gotten lively than before. Ten was only drinking abit because he said he didn't want to get extremely drunk, Nine was still in a bad mood over the dare the Master made him do, Eleven was in Emily and Charlene's room, playing on the dance-mats with the two girls and the Master was talking to a group of teenagers. He was beginning to get a little tipsy.

"I live upstairs you know" he said "I live in the apartment above."

"Oh that's nice" said a girl who clearly wasn't interested "come on guys, let's see if they've got any more vodka." The group of teens walked off and the Master was now fed up.

"How come no one wants to talk to me?" he asked himself before taking a swig from a can of beer one of the teens had left on the kitchen counter "oh that stuff is amazing." He got himself a can from the fridge, started drinking it and was slowly beginning to get drunk. After the party was over, the four timelords where heading back to their apartment and the Master was steaming drunk. Ten and Eleven had to hold him up because he was that drunk, he could barely walk.

"Bring me sunshine, bring me laughter, bring me flowers, bring me candy" he sang before laughing in a drunken manner.

"Once we get upstairs, you're going straight to bed" Ten told him "you drunken oath." The Master was still laughing and he fell to the ground before pulling himself up by holding onto Ten. He then grabbed the lapels of his jacket.

"How, how do you get your hair to stay like that?" he asked, pointing at Ten's hair "that hairdo is amazing."

"Alright that's enough now" Ten said. When they got to their apartment, the Master staggered into his room and pointed at the portrait of himself he had painted on the wall when they first moved in.

"W-who is that?" he slurred "good looking chap isn't he."

"That's you" Ten sighed "you painted that when we first moved here." The Master looked confused for a second before he erupted into a hysterical drunken giggle.

"Come on, let's just leave him here until he sobers up" Ten told the other two before they walked out of the Master's room, shutting the door behind them and his drunken giggles continuing on until they finally stopped half an hour later. Ten peeked round the door and saw him slumped across his bed, snoring.

"Well, he'll have a hang over in the morning" Ten commented before closing the door.

Coming up next, Nine and the Master end up stuck in an elevator together when it breaks down. How long will they be able to put up with each other? Find out next time.


	6. The one with the elevator

The one with the elevator

Ten was rummaging through the food cupboards, searching for some biscuits and he realised that they were out.

"Hey, what are you looking for?" Eleven asked as he entered the kitchen and poured himself an orange juice.

"Some biscuits but I think we've ran out" Ten replied as he searched again but found no biscuits "yes, we are defiantly out of biscuits. OK, I think it's time we had a house meeting." He turned to Eleven who was straightening his bow tie and told him to get Nine and the Master into the front room so he could inform them that they were out of biscuits. A few seconds later, the Master, Nine and Eleven were sat together on the sofa and Ten was stood up in front of them, hands in his pockets.

"Now, I have called this house meeting because we've run out of biscuits" he told them "now, I'm going to need one of you to nip down to the shop and buy at least a packet of hobnobs and Jammy dodgers, any volunteers?" No one raised their hands and Ten rubbed the side of his head.

"Come on, anyone?" he asked "OK, whoever goes gets some money for jelly babies." Immediately, the Master shot his hand up.

"I'll go, but on one condition" he said.

"And what's that?" Ten asked, folding his arms.

"I want one of you three to come with me, so I can have someone to talk to on the way there and back" the Master replied "so, who is it going to be?"

"I'd love to, but I'm really busy today, I've got lunch to do, then I've got to re plaster that hole in my bedroom" Ten replied.

"OK" the Master replied before looking at Eleven "how about you Mr bow-tie wearing time-lord, fancy a trip to the shops?"

"I'd love to but I think I'll stay behind and give Ten a hand" Eleven replied.

"Well, that's two down" the Master said, writing in an invisible note-book with an invisible pencil "I guess that only leaves Nine." He turned to Nine who was sat cross-armed on the sofa and walked up to him, asking if he wanted to come with him to the shops.

"I'd rather be locked in a room with ten Daleks" Nine said in sarcasm.

"Oh come on Niney, you don't get out much" the Master said, giving Nine a nudge.

"It kills me to say it, but he's right" Ten said "why don't you go along, it's about time you two did something together." Nine sighed and the Master was looking at him with big pleading eyes and a sulky face.

"Fine" he sighed "I'll go to the shops, but if he starts causing trouble then I'm leaving him."

"Oh, you wouldn't do that to me would you?" the Master asked, putting on his puppy dog face again.

"It depends" Nine replied "if you don't bug me." the Master did a salute and promised that he would try and behave himself. After Ten had given them the money, the two left the apartment to go to the shops.

"So, what does he want again?" the Master asked as they walked down the corridor to the staircase.

"Hobnobs and Jammy dodgers" Nine replied "maybe Eleven wants the Jammy dodgers." They walked round the staircase to find that the staircase had been closed off with a sigh saying **Staircase out of order due to paintwork, please use the elevators.**

"Well, guess we better use the lifts then" the Master said before he ran to the elevator with Nine following behind. When it arrived, the two got in and Nine pressed the button for the ground floor.

Back in the apartment, Ten was in his bedroom, plastering the small hole he had in his bedroom when Eleven walked in and asked him if he wanted some coffee.

"Go ahead, you making yourself a cup?" Ten replied.

"Yeah, I think we should have a coffee break" Eleven replied before he went into the kitchen. After he had made him and Ten a coffee, the two were sat on the sofa, drinking them.

"So, how do you think those two are getting on?" Eleven asked.

"I don't know, hopefully they'll come back best friends" Ten replied. Over at the nearby shop, Nine and the Master were in there buying biscuits and jelly babies. Nine was paying for the items and the Master was stood in the magazine isle, flicking through a pre-teen magazine.

"Ew, look at Justin bieber, rubbish excuse for a singer" he pointed out before shutting the magazine and putting it back just as Nine reappeared holding a plastic back.

"Right, that's us done, let's go back" he informed as he opened the shop door and the Master followed behind. The two then walked across the street and back to the apartment they lived at, walked inside and got back in the elevator as the staircase was still out of order.

"Well that was fun wasn't it. Going to the paper shop and looking through all those magazines" the Master said in a cheerful manner.

"You did all that, I was the one who got the stuff and paid for them" Nine replied.

"But it was still fun though" the Master replied back with a satisfied smirk and hands in his pockets "We should go to sainsburys next time." Suddenly, the elevator came to a shuddering halt and the lights went out, indicating that they had broken down.

"Shit" the Master muttered.

Upstairs, Ten and Eleven where still waiting for the other two to arrive back from the shop and were unaware that they were stuck in the elevator.

"OK, I'm going to get lunch started, hopefully, those two won't be long" Ten said as Eleven played on guitar hero.

"OK, but will you join with me on this game while it's cooking?" Eleven asked.

"I will do, just let me get dinner sorted first." Ten replied before he headed into the kitchen to get started on dinner.

Back in the elevator, Nine was attempting to ring the emergency hotline but the phone was down.

"This is just great, the phone line's down" Nine grumbled as he slid down the side and sat cross legged on the floor " they'll never know we're stuck here if the bloody phone isn't working." The Master however wasn't paying attention, he was busy writing **the Master was here and you will obey him **in felt tip on the wall.

"Why are you doing that?" Nine asked " you do know that's defacing public property."

"So, I might as well, seeing as we could be stuck in here forever" the Master replied. Nine looked at him in a weird way and said that they might not be stuck in the elevator forever.

"But the phone is down, like you said" the Master replied "so, if the phone isn't working and we can't call anyone, then we could be stuck here forever, ha ha ha."

"Oh will you just shut up" Nine snapped in annoyance "they'll probably notice on the elevator systems in the control room that it's broken down and they'll fix it."

"Woah, OK Mr snappy" the Master replied in a high pitched tone " no need to get all grumpy time-lord on us." Nine sighed, picked up the felt tip pen and drew a line on the floor between him and the Master.

"And you were complaining about me graffiting" the Master said before shaking his head "tut tut,shame on you." Nine gave him the evils and tossed the felt tip aside.

"Look, you stay in your space and I'll stay in mine" he replied.

"What are you going to do if I accidentally step over the line?" the Master teased. Nine sighed and rubbed the sides of his head.

"Don't start because I'm not in the mood right now" he replied. The Master raised his hands in the air and slowly turned around, facing the wall before he sat down and pulled out a twix from his trouser pocket.

"Hey, I didn't see you buy that" Nine said.

"That's because I stole it" the Master replied. Nine looked at him with a raised eyebrow and a weirded out expression.

"You stole a forty pence twix?" he asked "why didn't you just pay for it or let me know you were getting the twix?"

"It was more fun this way" the Master replied "besides, no one saw me and it's just a twix. I've done much worse things than swiping a chocolate bar, I've took over the world and killed a million people, that is much worse than stealing a twix."

Two hours had passed by and they were still stuck in the broken down elevator, Ten was beginning to wonder what was taking them so long.

"That chicken is going cold, were are those two" he wondered as he paced around the apartment. Eleven was sat on the sofa, flicking through the tv channels.

"Do you reckon they killed each other or got arrested because the Master burnt the shop down?" he asked.

"I hope not" Ten replied "I hope the Master hasn't got himself and Nine arrested." Back in the elevator, Nine and the Master were getting fed up of waiting around. Two and a half hours had passed by and the elevator still wasn't fixed.

"How long does it take them to fix the stupid thing?" Nine complained " it's been nearly three hours and no one has even realized that this stupid elevator has broken down and that two people are stuck inside." The Master sighed, stood up and took out his laser screwdriver, pointing it to the ceiling.

"What are you doing with that?" Nine asked.

"If I can burn a hole, we can climb through it and climb up the cable to our floor" the Master told him "You're right, no one has bothered to try and fix the elevator so I thought it we should climb up the cables up to the fourth floor".

"Are you mad, it's going to be a long way to climb, seeing as were halfway up the first floor" nine said as the top of the elevator came crashing down, just missing the two.

"You want to get out of here don't you?" the Master asked as he climbed out of the hole which was at the side of the ceiling.

"Well, yeah" Nine shouted.

"Well come on then" the Master shouted from outside the elevator. Nine sighed and hoisted himself through the hole and onto the top of the elevator. The Master was halfway up the cables and before Nine climbed onto the cables, he used his sonic screwdriver to repair the hole and then began climbing up the cables.

"Good plan huh?" the Master shouted from above.

"Why didn't you do that when we first broken down?" Nine shouted back.

"Well I didn't know we would be waiting for nearly three hours" the Master yelled back "this is the only way we'll get back upstairs." When they arrived at the fourth floor, the Master used his laser screwdriver to burn a hole through the elevator doors before he threw himself through the hole and into the corridor. He looked through the hole and saw Nine climbing up the cable, not far behind.

"Come on slow coach, I beat you" the Master chided with a smirk. A few minutes later, Nine had arrived and he threw himself through the hole before repairing the hole with his sonic screwdriver.

"OK, let's head back before the other two call a search party out for us" the Master said before he ran round the corner with Nine not far behind. When they got back at the apartment, they were greeted by Ten who was stood waiting for them in the front room, arms folded.

"Hello" the Master greeted "honey, we're home."

"Were have you two been?" Ten asked, eyebrows raised.

"Ah, i'm glad you asked that, you see, me and Nine were walking arm in arm to the shop when all of a sudden, we were taken prisoner by the Daleks" the Master replied.

" That's not what happened, we got stuck in the elevator because it had broken down and we climbed up the cables" Nine said "that's how we got out."

"Yes, that is true" the Master added " I just made that Dalek story up. So, what's for lunch?"

Coming up next, the Timelords take a trip to Blackpool, will it be the day out to remember or another day out ending in disaster? find out next time.


	7. The one at blackpool

The one at Blackpool

It had been a couple of days since the elevator incident and the timelord's apartment was full with a lively atmosphere because today, they were taking a trip to Blackpool. Ten dashed around, trying to find the sun-screen, Eleven was decided whether to bring his yellow bucket or red bucket, the Master was already prepared as he was dressed in a Hawaiian shirt, bright blue trousers, sunglasses and a sun hat.

"We're only going to Blackpool, not Hawaii" Nine said when he saw what the Master was wearing.

"Hey, if I want to dress like this, then I will, OK, big ears" the Master replied before he stalked off into the kitchen. Eleven walked up to Ten and asked him how they were going to travel to Blackpool.

"We'll be taking the Tardis" Ten replied "it's cheaper than taking the train and it will get us there much quicker." After an hour of getting everything sorted, the four timelords where all gathered around the Tardis.

"OK, has everybody got what they need?" Ten asked. The other three nodded and Ten was satisfied before he started stroking the side of the Tardis.

"With this baby, we'll get their much quicker" he said "and it saves us money on train fairs. I don't know what I would do if I didn't have this beauty."

"Oh my god, you act like you're married to that thing" the Master pointed out "ha ha, I can just see the wedding now. Do you Doctor, take this Tardis to be your lawfully wedded wife, do you promise to love her, cherish her and treat her with respect until death do you part?"

"Thank you Master" Ten sighed "OK, shall we get going?" The four of them stepped into the Tardis and when they we're all inside, Ten set the coordinates for Blackpool and two minutes later, they arrived in an alleyway which was just round the corner from the seafront. When they stepped out, Ten took a deep breath and smiled.

"Ahhhhhhhhhh, smell that sea air" he sighed before turning to the group "OK, I've got everything planned out, firstly, we'll go and have a look around the Arcades, then we'll go and check out the tower then after that, we'll get fish and chips and eat them on the beach, after that, we'll hit the pleasure beach and then go home." So, the first thing they did was go into one of the Arcades and the Master was the first one to notice that there was a dance machine in this one.

"Now, we're talking" he said as he rushed to the dance machine, put a pound coin into the slot and started dancing.

"Do any of you Doctors want to compete against me?" he asked "Come on, don't be shy."

Ten was the one who volunteered and he jumped onto the dance machine next to the one the Master was using.

"I bet I can beat you, just like I beat you at guitar hero" Ten said.

"Oh no you don't" the Master replied in a threatening tone "I'm going to win this one and win this I shall."

"Oh, I'm not missing this" Eleven said as he stood to watch before he turned to Nine who was on the coin machines "Nine, are you going to watch?"

"Just a minute" Nine replied who was still facing the coin machine "I'm busy here."

"Suit yourself" Eleven replied before he went back to watch the Master and Ten compete in the ultimate dance off. After five games, the two finished on the dance machines and the Master was bragging about how he was a much better dancer. Ten rolled his eyes and went to one of the claw machines which had stuffed tiggers and stuffed pooh bears.

"Be careful with them, those things are rubbish" Nine warned "the claw doesn't even grip the toy properly."

"Well, maybe I'll get lucky" Ten replied with a grin "besides, I've always wanted a stuffed tigger." He then put the money into the slot for five goes, grabbed the joystick and used it to move the claw across, then down to one of the stuffed tiggers. It had hold of it for a few seconds then dropped the tigger before it reached the hatch, so he tried again and again until on the final attempt, he finally managed to get a stuffed tigger.

"OK, shall we check out another arcade before we go to the tower?" he asked the other three who nodded.

An hour had passed by and the four had been in at least four of the arcades before heading over to Blackpool tower.

"Are we actually going to go all the way up to the top and then back down again?" the Master asked.

"Yeah, we'll ride up in the elevator all the way up to the top, stay up there for a bit and then go back down" Ten replied as they walked inside.

"Well, let's hope the elevator doesn't break down this time" the Master joked "otherwise, we'll have to climb the cables to get up to the top." When the four had all arrived inside, they went up to the elevator which would be taking them to the top of the tower. Ten pressed the button to take them all the way up to the top and the elevator began to move all the way up to the top of the tower, carrying the four timelords, plus another few people inside. When it reached the top, the four got out and walked up to the window which gave off a view of the entire seaside.

"Wow, you can see everything from up here" Eleven said in amazement "the Ferris wheel on the beach, coral island, the Pepsi Max roller-coaster, it's cool." Ten took out a digital camera and took a photo of the view before asking the other three to get together for a photo.

"What are you going to do with these photos, put them on your face-book page?" Nine asked as they all ganged up together for a photo.

"Maybe" Ten replied before holding the camera out in front "Ok, everybody say Gallifrey."

"Gallifrey" the four timelords yelled before Ten hit the button to take the photo. After that, they spend a good half an hour at the top of the tower before going back down to buy some fish and chips. When they got their fish and chips, they sat on the beach to eat them and watched as children passed by on the donkeys, couples walked hand in hand, children building sandcastles or paddling in the sea.

"It's nice to get out now and again isn't it" Ten said "especially the seaside, all the fresh sea air, the fish and chips, candy floss, rock and the beach." Nine was being attacked by a seagull that was after his fish and the Master was filming it with the video recorder he had bought with him.

"Look at this, Nine has made a new friend" he teased "what's the name of your new friend, Nine?"

"Will you stop filming me getting attacked by a flaming seagull" Nine snapped.

"But I want to upload it to you-tube" the Master replied as he carried on filming "I was thinking of calling it something like Timelord gets harassed by a seagull." Nine grumbled in frustration as he attempted to swipe at the seagull which was still trying to steal his fish and Ten decided to step in and help his previous incarnation by using his sonic screwdriver to drive off the menacing bird.

"Thanks for that" Nine replied "now I can eat my fish in piece."

"Well, at least I got the whole thing on tape, now I'm going to upload it to you-tube" the Master announced before he put the camera away "so, what are we going to do after we've finished our fish and chips?"

"We're going to the pleasure beach" Ten said " maybe we should give the Pepsi Max a go and some of the other rides."

"Oh, can we sit on the front row because it's more better that way" Eleven asked.

"Sure, if we manage to get a front row seat" Ten replied. After they had finished their fish and chips, the timelords set off for the pleasure beach and when they first arrived, they joined the queue for the Pepsi Max roller-coaster.

"My god, look at how long the line is" the Master pointed out when he noticed the really long queue for the big roller-coaster "we could be here for years."

"That is not possible" Ten replied "it might be an hour or so until we get out turn. All we have to do now is be patient and wait."

After an hour of waiting, they finally got their turn on the roller-coaster and they also managed to get the front row seats. Eleven and Nine where in the front seat, the Master and Ten were in the seat behind and they listened as the voice over guy instructed all riders to keep their hands and feet in the rides at all times.

"Better do what the gentleman says" the Master said "don't want any nasty accidents do we?"

Ten was about to say something when the ride began slowly moving up the track and when it reached the top, it stopped there for a mere few seconds before rushing down the hill, round corners and up another hill. After the ride was over, the four got off and discussed on what ride they should try out next.

"How about the teacups?" Eleven asked, pointing at the map "they look interesting." When the three Doctors were discussing on what rides to go on, the Master decided it was time to cause some trouble, so he quietly sneaked off to do so.

"We'll go on the teacups first, then we'll head for the iron-bru revolution, then after that we'll go on the Valhalla and then we'll check out avalanche ride" Ten suggested.

Meanwhile, the Master was walking around the park, trying to find a way to cause some havoc when he noticed an empty announcement booth nearby and with an evil smirk, he went inside the booth, picked up the microphone and opened his mouth.

Ten had just finished looking at the map when he noticed that all the people where running around screaming and shouting, pushing past each other to get out of the park.

"What's happening?" Eleven asked before a very familiar voice was heard over the loud speakers.

"EVERYBODY RUN FOR YOUR LIVES, THE BOMB IS GOING TO GO OFF AT ANY SECOND, GET OUT WHILE YOU STILL CAN."

"Just wait until I get my hands on him" Ten growled in frustration as he walked through the crowds of very scared people, his previous and next incarnation following behind him.

"HURRY, RUN EVERYBODY OR YOU'LL ALL BE BLOWN TO KINGDOM COME" the Master's voice said over the loud speakers.

Back in the announcement booth, the Master put the microphone down and exited the booth to find three very angry Doctors waiting for him.

"Guys, did you just hear, there's a bomb in the park" he said acting all shocked. Ten raised an eyebrow and shook his head.

"There isn't a bomb is there?" he asked.

"No" the Master replied, rubbing the back of his head "I made that up." Ten nodded and grabbed the Master by the ear, dragged him through the now empty theme park and all the way back to the Tardis.

"Well, that was a good day out wasn't it?" the Master asked as Ten finally let go of his ear.

"It was until you scared the entire pleasure beach into thinking there was a bomb counting down somewhere in the theme park" Ten said in an annoyed tone before he opened the door to the Tardis and the four of them stepped inside.

"Well that wasn't the only thing I did while at the pleasure beach" the Master said as Ten set the coordinates for back home "I stole all the plastic spoons from one of the cafes." The Master then tipped the plastic bag he was holding and a million blue plastic spoons dropped onto the Tardis floor, clattering everywhere.

"Now that is what I call a souvenir" the Master said with a grin "every single plastic spoon from one of the pleasure beach cafes."

"Why on earth do you want to have plastic spoons for?" Nine asked.

"I don't know, I just felt like stealing them" the Master admitted. The other three timelords groaned in dispair, but the Master paid no attention to them as he was busy messing around with he plastic spoons.

Coming up next time, the timelords look after Charlene and Emily Mitchell when their parents go on a night out, that's to come next folks.


	8. the one where the Mitchell girls visit

The one where the Mitchell girls stay over

Ten had just been to the shops to buy some more milk and butter and he was now on his way back when he bumped into his downstairs neighbour,James mitchell.

"Oh hello" Ten greeted, grabbing James's hand and shaking it "haven't seen you around for a while."

"Yes, well, been busy, settling in and getting the girls settled into a new school and new home" James replied.

"Oh that's nice" Ten replied "well, I'm going to get going now." He was about to leave when James stopped him.

"Listen, do you and your three other flatmates have any plans tonight?" he asked.

"No, why do you ask?" Ten asked curiously.

"Well, me and Denise are going to a party tonight and we was wondering if you'll look after Charlene and Emily for us tonight at your place?" he asked "they've been wanting to see your place since they first met you four when we first moved here, so, what do you say."

"I don't see why not" Ten replied "we'll keep them entertained, so, how long do you want us to watch them for?"

"Well if the girls get tired,just let them crash out on your sofa so we don't have to wake them up when we get back and we'll pick them up in the morning" James said. Ten nodded and he went upstairs to inform the other timelords that the two young girls would be coming round later.

"So, those girl's parents are dumping them on four people they hardly know,just so they can go out partying" Nine commented.

"Well, he did seem to trust us" Ten explained "besides, they are only ten and eight years old, I don't think they'll be too much trouble." Later that evening, James and Denise arrived with the two girls accompanied with a fold out table held by Denise and two chairs, held by Charlene and Emily.

"I didn't know you were bringing the whole house" Ten joked, nodding at the fold out table and chairs.

"It's Emily's table and chair set" Charlene said with an eye roll "she's insisting on playing tea parties, not that I'm having anything to do with it." Ten then smiled at the younger girl who was holding a small suitcase and asked her what she had in it.

"It's my tea set" Emily said.

"That's nice" Ten replied "so, do you two young ladies want to come in." Charlene and Emily walked into the flat, followed by Denise who carried the fold out table in.

"Do you mind if I set this down somewhere?" Denise asked. Ten smiled and said she could put it down anywhere, so she set it out in the front room and Emily immediately began setting her tea set out onto the table.

"OK, if the girls get tired then just let them conk out on the sofa and we'll come by tomorrow morning and pick them up" James explained.

"Don't worry about a think, they'll be fine" Ten reassured them. James nodded and bid goodbye to his daughters and told them both to be good before he and Denise left to go on their night out.

"They often did this back where we used to live" Charlene told Eleven " go on night outs and leave us with our next door neighbour, Mrs. Carpenter and she was really really strict with us."

"How strict?" Eleven asked.

"Real strict, she was old fashioned and she would never allow us to bring any modern stay stuff to her house" the ten year old girl explained. Ten entered the living room and suggested that they should introduced themselves to the two girls so they'll get to know them better.

"Now, me and these two gentlemen here are the Doctors" Ten said, pointing at him, Eleven and Nine "I'm the tenth Doctor so you can call me Ten for short, the man with the large ears and leather jacket is the ninth Doctor, but you can call him nine."

"I am fully aware that my ears are slightly large but you don't have to make a big deal about it" Nine said in a annoyed tone.

"Sorry Nine" Ten replied before focusing back on the girls "that man with the tweed jacket and bow tie is the Eleventh Doctor, but you can call him Eleven for short."

"He has a funny hairdo" Emily giggled.

"How can you three be Doctors if you don't have white coats and stethoscopes?" Charlene asked "and what about the fourth one in your group, is he Doctor number Twelve or something?" The Master, who was in the kitchen, heard what Charlene had just said and burst into laughter.

"Me, a Doctor" he chuckled "You've got that one wrong girl."

"Ok, then who are you supposed to be then, the paramedic?" Charlene asked. The Master smirked and walked towards the ten year old who was stood in the middle of the room, arms folded whilst Emily tried desperately to hold her giggles.

"Do you really want to know who I am?" he asked the young girl who nodded, showing no fear.

" My name is the Master" he said, trying to sound menacing and hoping to scare the girl, but instead she just replied with a simple "OK" and walked off.

"What is it with this kid?" he asked "she didn't even shake with fear or run away."

"Maybe she doesn't scare easily" Ten replied "she does seem pretty confident."

Later that evening, Emily was bored, she wanted someone to play tea parties with her, Charlene refused to play because she said she was too old for things like that, Ten said he would love to play but he was too busy, Nine simply refused because if wasn't his thing, Eleven had a little play with her but Ten needed his help with something. The only person she could ask, was the Master and he was in the kitchen, so she walked in there and found him stood by the fridge, eating a Sandwich. Emily took a deep breath, walked up to the troublesome timelord and tapped him on the arm.

"Hello, what do you want?" he asked, when he noticed the eight year old girl stood next to him.

"Will you play tea parties with me please?" she asked "no one else will." The Master couldn't believe what he was hearing, a little girl was asking him to play tea parties.

"Look here, I am the Master and I don't play tea parties" he told her "now why don't you run along."

"Please" she begged "play with me." The Master sighed and finally decided to play tea parties with her. She would have probably bothered him until he finally agreed. So here he was, the Master, former ruler of the world sat at the small kiddies table, sporting a pink tiara on his head and wearing a pink frilly apron, Emily was sat at the opposite of him, pouring some pretend tea into the small plastic cups. The other three timelords where getting a real giggle at the sight of how ridiculous the Master looked right now.

"Look who's wearing the tiara now" Nine chuckled. The Master grumbled and folded his arms as Emily handed him one of the pink plastic teacups.

"Here's your tea Masterella" she said. It was at the point when the Doctors, including Charlene erupted into fits of hysterical giggles.

"Shut up" the Master growled "stop laughing at me."

"Sorry, we can't help it, Masterella" Ten snorted "that name is just so funny." They started laughing again and the Master was beginning to regret into agreeing to play tea parties.

"You look funny in that pink tiara and frilly apron" Eleven giggled.

"Well I don't find it funny" the Master replied "you see, funny is like this" he pulled a smiley face "not funny is like this" he pulled a frowny face "and right now I'm not like this" he pulled the smiley face again "I'm like this" he pulled the frowny face. Emily giggled at him and offered him some pretend biscuits.

"Can I go now?" he asked "I don't want to play Tea parties any more."

"Not until you finish your pretend biscuit" Emily said. Sighing, the Master took the invisible biscuit, ate it and then asked if he could go.

"OK, I'm getting tired of playing tea parties now anyway" Emily replied. The Master stood up, took off the apron and the tiara before joining the others on the sofa.

"OK, so what do you two girls want to do now?" Ten asked after the whole tea party fiasco " do you want to watch a bit of telly or play a game?"

"What games do you have?" Charlene asked. Ten told them that they had scrabble, cards, monopoly, snakes and ladders, connect four, the sega or guitar hero.

"I think we'll watch some telly" Charlene said "I don't feel like playing any games."

"Me neither" Emily said with a yawn "I'm kind of tired." Half an hour later, the four timelords and the two young girls where watching a cartoon on the telly, Emily was sat on Ten's lap, fast asleep but Charlene was still up, watching the cartoon and one of the characters was taking part in a quiz show.

"_Homer, name one word that rhymes with tractor"_ The host said to one of the contestants who was pretty confused on how to answer that question.

"Factor" the Master yelled "it's factor you dumb human being." Ten looked at the Master and told him to be quiet because he could end up waking Emily.

"_Is it factor?" _The contestant on the game show asked.

"_That is corrected, congratulations Homer you have won a twenty million dollars and a free holiday to Ibiza"_ the Host said.

"_Woohoo"_ the contestant cheered, throwing his arms up in the air. A few hours had passed and both girls had fallen asleep on the sofa, Ten covered them both up with a blanket and quietly walked away from the sofa.

"So, when are their parents picking them up again?" Eleven whispered.

"Tomorrow morning" Ten replied "I don't think they wanted to disturb them if they came to pick them up tonight while they were still sleeping." The other three timelords nodded in agreement before they turned in themselves.

The next morning, James and Denise came by to pick up the two girls up and the first thing they heard from their youngest about what they had been doing.

"I hope they haven't been any trouble" James said "because you can tell me if they have been troublesome, especially Emily."

"They've been no trouble at all" Ten replied "absolutely no trouble." James and Denise were glad to hear that and they left with their two daughters.

"OK, what shall we does everyone fancy doing tomorrow?" Ten asked "how about, a camp out, we'll bring a four man tent, food, chairs, guitar, the works. So, who's in?" The other three raised their hands.

"OK, that settles it, tomorrow, we are going camping" Ten announced.

Coming up next, the timelords take a camping trip in the woods and meet a gang of meanies who don't want to share the woodland, that's all to come next.


	9. The one with the camping trip

The one with the camping trip

The next day Ten was as good as his word,the timelords where going to take a camping trip up in the woods somewhere and they were all running around the apartment, getting everything sorted after Ten had gone to buy a six man tent from Argos.

"Why have you got a six man tent when there's only four of us?" Nine asked.

"So we have plenty of room for all the stuff we'll be taking" Ten replied "so I thought a six man tent would be ideal." Nine nodded and he went to look for the insect repellent because Ten said they should bring the insect repellent because of all the insects that could be there. After a couple of hours of getting everything sorted, the four timelords all piled into the Tardis and Ten set the coordinates for a woodland area in which they could go camping in.

"OK, now is everyone ready and have we got everything we need?" Ten asked. The other three were surrounded by the six man tent, fishing rods, food, sleeping bags etc and Ten was satisfied with all the stuff.

"Hey, why have we got a jar of caterpillars?" Eleven asked when he picked up a jar of caterpillars which was amongst the items they were bringing with them.

"They're mine" the Master replied, snatching the jar from Eleven "I'm using them as bait for the fishing." Eleven nodded and sat down on the tardis chair, tossing a bouncy ball up in the air whilst Ten told Nine to stop moping around and be cheerful for once as he was complaining about how the whole camping trip was going to be boring.

"Well, once you regenerate into me, then you'll be a lot more hyper and more cheerful" Ten replied before he went to check on the scanner "we're almost there, just five more minutes." Five minutes later, the tardis materialised into a woodland area and the four timelords stepped out, carrying all the camping equipment with them. Ten locked the Tardis before he turned to the other three and told them that they needed to find an area to pitch the tent up.

"How about near the tardis" Eleven suggested "that way we can keep an eye on it so it doesn't get damaged or grafitied by teenage hoodlums."

"Good thinking" Ten replied. As they were getting the tent all ready to put up, they heard shouting and saw four large men striding towards them, looking extremely hacked off and menacing.

"Oi, you four idiots are trespassing on our land" one of the large men growled and he seemed to be the leader of the little gang of large men "I suggest you pack up your tent and leave right now, unless you want to feel how powerful our fists can be." Ten sighed and walked up to the leader of the large man gang.

"This is public property my good friend and we have every right to camp out here" he told him "now why don't you four large fellows be on your way and leave me and my friends alone." It was at that moment when the large men erupted into mad laughter and the leader started poking Ten in his skinny ribs.

"Are you looking for a fight skinny, because I'm all prepared" the leader chuckled.

"As am I" the Master said before running towards the gang leader fists ready only to be stopped by Nine and Eleven who were holding him back "come on, let me at him, let me at him."

"Don't, they're not worth it" Nine told him "you don't want to make things worse than they all ready are." Ten sighed again, turned to the gang of large men and told them to leave right now, never to bother them again. The other three were very surprised to see how calm he was being when they were being threatened by four large men.

"Fine, but we don't want to see your faces around here when we get back" the leader threatened "because if we do, then you'll all wish you've never been born."

"Bye bye" the Master said, giving them a sarcastic wave "get lost down a hole somewhere." After the large man gang had left, the timelords got started on putting the tent up and that was a huge challenge. Nine was sat cross legged on the ground, reading the instructions and holding two metal poles.

"Insert hole A into hole B. Well if I could find where hole A and hole b was, then I wouldn't be in this mess" he complained. The Master was leaning over Nine's shoulder and he was finding it quite amusing that he was struggling to put a tent together.

"What's wrong, having a little trouble on building a tent?" the Master asked in a mocking tone "oh dear, you poor poor unfortunate soul." Nine turned around and shot his fellow timelord a glare, indicating that he wanted him to leave but the Master wasn't keen on leaving him alone and kept constantly annoying him as he attempted to help put the tent together.

"I swear to god, if you don't leave me alone then I'll do something I might mostly regret" Nine growled.

"Like what?" the Master asked, arms folded and a smug look on his face.

"I don't know yet, but it won't be pleasant, now go away before I do whatever I'm going to do" Nine warned.

An hour had passed by and they had succeeded into putting the tent up plus all the sleeping bags inside.

"OK, what shall we do now?" Ten asked "how about we all do some fishing, there's a lake down there so we'll fish there." So they gathered up the fishing equipment and the Master's jar of caterpillars before heading down to the lake which wasn't far from where they had pitched up the tent.

"I'm going to catch the biggest fish, just you watch me" the Master bragged as he set his fishing rod up "and it's going to be much bigger than any of the ones you catch and I'm going to bury it in Nine's bed so it will slowly rot and stink his entire bedroom out." Ten glared at the Master and told him that he was going to do no such thing like that. Half an hour had passed by and no one had caught one single fish except for Eleven who had caught a small trout but it did a flop and a backflip back into the water.

"That is one talented fish, I wonder if it's been genetically modified to do that when it gets caught by a fishing rod" the Master inquired "maybe I could get a fish like that to do whatever I tell it to." Nine scoffed and pointed out that the fish would grow to realise what kind of person the Master really was and rebel against him.

"Can't we use Nine as bait, he's starting to bore me?" the Master complained "and maybe using him would get us a good enough chance of catching something."

"Like what?" Ten questioned "what kind of fish would want to eat him."

"Piranhas" the Master replied with a grin "or maybe even a shark." Nine was horrified when he heard this and Ten said there was no way that the Master was going to do no such a thing when the large man gang made another appearance.

"You guys, those large men are backed" Eleven pointed out. Ten sighed in annoyance as the leader walked up to them and demanded to know what they were doing.

"Erm, we are fishing, you got a problem with that?" the Master asked, looking all cocky with his arms folded and facial expression.

"This lake belongs to us, you have no right fishing in it" the leader spat "we own this entire woodland, even this lake so no one else gets to fish in it, except us, got it." Eleven looked nervous, Nine was just rolling in eyes in boredom, the Master was stood there looking cocky and Ten was standing up to the gang of large men.

"Look here, this woodland is public property and we have come here for a camping trip and we are not going to let a group of people like you ruin it for us, got it?" Ten told them in a warning tone before the gang turned around and walked off, hopefully never to bother the four timelords again.

"Hey, I think the Master has caught something" Eleven said, pointing at the Master's fishing rod that was twitching and the master ran to it, grabbed hold of it and tried to reel in whatever he had caught.

"Oh, please be a mutant fish, please be a mutant fish" he begged as he started to pull whatever he had caught out of the water only for it to be a car tyre and not the mutant fish he had been hoping for.

"What kind of lake is, that is just wrong" Eleven said pointing at the tyre "and it's disgusting." After a while, they hadn't caught anything and were getting bored of fishing so they decided to head back to the camp-site, only to find it completly trashed and a message grafitied on the tent saying "**YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED." **

"It's those bullies isn't it" Eleven asked "they did this." Ten nodded and pointed out that it could be possible, seeing that they had a problem with them, even though they hadn't done anything to offend them as they were on public property, so it was open to everybody and not just those gang of bullying large men.

"Right, it's time for a little revenge I think" the Master said "now, we're going to need shovels, do we have any shovels?"

"There's some in the Tardis" Ten pointed out "but what do you have in mind?"

"You'll find out Doctor, you'll find out" the Master said in a menacing tone before laughing in a sinister manner. Half an hour later, the Master had gone to search for the gang of large men and found them hanging around an old shed, smoking.

"Oi you lot" the Master yelled right before the four large men looked up and saw him stood there "yes I'm talking to you, the guys who's biceps are bigger than their brains." The four large men got up and started walking towards the Master who was grinning in amusement and beckoning them to come closer before he broke into a sprint with the large men in pursuit until they found him stood in front of a large pile of leaves and twigs.

"Yoohoo, I'm over her, come and get me" the Master teased with a huge grin on his face "you no brained human apes"

"OK buddy you asked for it" the leader said, pulling the sleeves on his shirt back "allow me to introduce my fist to your smug little face." The gang then broke into a run towards where the Master was standing, looking all smug and when they ran onto the pile of leaves and twigs, they suddenly plummeted into a six foot deep hole. The Master then peered into the hole and gave them a little wave before turning around and heading back to where the other three where hiding.

"Did it work" Eleven asked "did our trap work?"

"Like a charm" the Master replied "I don't think they'll be able to get out of that hole for a while." The other three seemed satisfied and they headed back to the camp-site to fix it back up again after it had been demolished by that gang of large men.

A few hours later, night had fallen and the four timelords where sat round the camp-fire, toasting marshmallows and eating baked beans and sausage rolls.

"Do you think those guys will be able to climb out of that hole?" Eleven asked. Ten doubted it and told Eleven that the hole was at least six foot deep and it would be quite a challenge for them to climb out.

"Unless it rains heavily and they swim out" the Master suggested "well, if they do, then we'll build another hole and make it much more deeper than the first one, so deep that they'll never be able to climb out again." After a good few hours of toasting marshmallows and singing some traditional camp-fire songs, the timelords all piled into the tent and snuggled down into their sleeping bags. Eleven had removed his bow-tie and place it in a little black box to keep it clean and dust free before putting that in a much bigger box and setting it down next to his sleeping bag.

"What a day it's been eh, well we've got one more day and then we're going back home" Ten announced "maybe we should take a real holiday, like to Florida or Spain." Eleven nodded in interest and proceeded to floss his teeth, the Master was already sock on so he didn't hear what Ten had planned and Nine just shrugged his shoulders before taking his leather Jacket off and tossing it aside just before Ten simply shrugged their reactions off and went into his own sleeping bag.

Coming next time, the timelords take part in a grill off and they have to compete against each other, that's all to come next.


	10. The one with the grill off

The one with the grill off

"WELOME CITIZENS OF LONDON TO THE ANUALL BARBEQUE CONTEST" the announcer spoke through the microphone "NOW YOU ALL KNOW WHAT HAPPENS, THREE TEAMS WITH TWO PEOPLE COMPETE AGAISNT EACH OTHER IN COOKING ALL KINDS OF BARBEQUE FOODS AND THE WINNING TEAM RECIEVES A FREE BARBEQUE. OK, LET'S MEET OUT CONTESTANT. ON TEAM ONE WE HAVE CAPTAIN JACK HARKNESS AND GWEN COOPER."

Captain Jack was waving both arms in the air with a huge toothy grin plastered on his face, whilst Gwen was stood next to him, calmly waving as the crowds cheered.

"ON TEAM TWO WE HAVE THE NINETH DOCTOR AND THE ELEVENTH DOCTOR" the announcer bellowed. Eleven was waving happily to the cheering crowd whilst Nine stood there, arms folded.

"Why aren't you waving, they love us" Eleven said. Reluctantly, Nine began to wave at the cheering crowd whilst Captain Jack and Eleven where both waving in the same manner.

"OK, LET'S MEET OUR FINAL TWO CONTESTANTS ON TEAM THREE, THE TENTH DOCTOR AND THE MASTER." Ten was happily waving to the audience as they cheered again, but the Master was focusing on Captain Jack who was still waving with two arms in the air.

"Look at the freak" he scoffed "if he doesn't stop waving like a goof soon, I'm going to go over there and do something I might not regret."

"OK CONTESTANTS, ON THE FIRST ROUND YOU WILL BE GRILLING BURGERS AND REMEMBER, THE TEAM WHO'S BURGERS ARE COOKED PROPERLY ARE THE WINNDERS, OK CONTESTANTS, GET GRILLING" the announcer bellowed.

"OK, we need to fill this up with charcoal" Ten said "now one of us has to put it on there."

"I have an idea" the Master said "we'll do rock, paper, scissors and whoever loses has to put the charcoal on the barbecue and put the food on the grill." Ten thought for a second before agreeing to take part in the little challenge.

"Rock paper scissors" the two chanted as they bounced their fists up and down. Ten got paper and the Master got scissors.

"Oooh, scissors cut paper, you lose" he told Ten "well, looks like your putting the stuff on there." Sighing, Ten poured the charcoal on before putting at least six hamburgers onto the grill, which where quite big.

"Wow, look at those babies" the Master said as he eyed the hamburgers "I hope they taste as good as they look."

"Well, we've just got to be careful, not to burn them" Ten replied, before he turned to Nine and Eleven who's burgers where grilling nicely and theirs weren't grilling at all. He then realized that he had not lit the charcoal up yet, so he took out a box of matches, lit a match and threw it into the charcoal before the burgers began grilling.

"Now what?" the Master asked.

"We just wait for them to cook" Ten replied "and keep flipping them over now and then." The Master sighed in boredom and folded his arms.

"How long will it take?" he asked "because I'm going to be bored just standing here and waiting for six hamburgers to cook."

"I guess until they go brown and crispy I suppose" Ten replied "we don't want them undercooked and over cooked do we?"

"Well I'm not waiting" the Master replied as he took out his laser screwdriver. Ten gave him a puzzled look and asked him what he was planning on doing with it.

"I'm going to use this on the burgers, maybe it will force them to cook quicker" the Master replied.

"That would be cheating" Ten said as he took the laser screwdriver from him "and I'm confiscating this, don't want any more trouble from you today." The Master nodded and did an angel pose. A couple of minutes had passed and Ten was beginning to turn the hamburgers round so that will cook on the other side, watching Nine and Eleven grill their burgers and was beginning to get a feeling that they where going to win this round plus he needed to use the bathroom so he asked the Master to keep an eye on the hamburgers whilst he went to one of the portable toilets. After he was out of sight, the Master grinned evilly and took out his secret weapon, extremely hot chilly powder and he was planning on using it on team one. He waited until they weren't looking and quietly sneaked over to their barbecue slot, poured the entire tub of chilly powder onto their still grilling burgers and went back to his own barbecue slot, only to discover that the fire on the charcoal had gone out.

"Oh no you don't" he muttered before grabbing the matchbox, lighting at least ten matches and throwing them onto the barbecue causing the burgers to go up in flames. When Ten emerged from the portable toilet, he discovered a huge flame coming from their barbecue so he rushed over to discover that the burgers where up in flames.

"What the hell have you done?" he asked through gritted teeth "I've been gone for two minutes and I come back to our burgers on fire."

"The fire went out so I lit another one to keep the burgers cooking" the Master replied.

"How many matches did you put on?" Ten demanded.

"Ten" the Master replied "at least the burgers would cook faster." Ten sighed in annoyance and buried his face in his hands, before pushing his hair back in a frustrated manner.

"You're not supposed to put that many on" he told his fellow timelord "you're supposed to only put one on, now we have black burgers." The Master snickered in amusement and Ten rolled his eyes in annoyance.

"OK CONTESTANTS, YOUR TIME IS UP, IT IS NOW TIME FOR YOU TO TRY YOUR BURGERS TO SEE WHAT THEY TASTE LIKE" the announcer called out. The three teams put their burgers on bread buns as the judge walked to the first team.

"OK, each of you take a bite from your burgers and tell me what they taste like" he told them. Captain Jack and Gwen both took a bite off their burgers and immediately started coughing and spluttering.

"Oh my god, this is hot" Gwen said between coughing " water, I need water." Captain Jack had been coughing that much that he ended up choking on a piece of burger that got stuck in his throat before he fell down the ground, dead.

"OH, LOOKS LIKE WE HAVE A MAN DOWN" the announcer said "JUST BE PATIENT FOLKS, WE'LL SORT OUT THE SITUATION IMMEDIATELY." The judge looked down at Captain Jack who was laying lifeless on the floor and began to assume he was dead when Captain Jack came back to life.

"God damn it" he said "I just died, because of a god damn burger."

"I think someone sabotaged them Jack " Gwen said "I don't think the packet said that these burgers where extremely spicy." The judge shook his head and wrote down on a clipboard before moving on to the second team.

"Hello sir" Eleven said as the judge arrived at their slot " come to sample our fine burgers have you, well I can assure you that they are done properly." He then took a huge bite from his burger and nodded in satisfaction "see, they taste good." The judge nodded and wrote down in his clipboard again before he realized that Nine wasn't eating any of the burgers.

"Are you not trying any sir?" he asked.

"I'm not hungry" Nine replied. The judge nodded and moved onto team three and discovered that their burgers where burnt to a crisp.

"What happened here?" he asked.

"We burnt our burgers Einstein" the Master replied in a sarcastic manner. Ten gave him a warning look and looked at the judge apologeticly.

"We put too many matches on by accident" Ten replied "silly mistake to make really, so we won't be tasting them I'm afraid." The judge nodded and wrote down on his clipboard before walking off. Ten sighed and rubbed his forehead, knowing for a fact that they would lose this round and possibly the next round if another disaster like the one they had happened again.

"OK FOLKS, WE HAVE OUR VOTES AND THE WINNERS OF THIS ROUND IS TEAM TWO" the announcer called out. The crowds cheered as Eleven and Nine took a bow, Captain Jack and Gwen where drinking huge bottles of water whilst Ten and the Master both seemed disappointed to realize that their two flatmates had beat them.

"Well, we're going to win this next round" the Master boasted "this next round is ours."

"Well if you try really hard not to burn whatever we have to cook next, then maybe we might win" Ten replied. The second round was the final round and this time, they had to grill chicken legs and Ten grimaced as he placed four greasy chicken legs on the grill and lit the charcoal. He didn't exactly like the idea of touching uncooked greasy chicken legs but he had lost at rock paper scissors and it was part of the deal that if one of them had lost then they had to put the food on the barbecue.

Over at the next slot and Eleven was eyeing up the chicken legs that him and Nine were grilling.

"Look at these, I reckon these are going to come through nicely" Eleven said "don't you think so Nine." Nine nodded and yawned in boredom which gave Eleven the feeling that Nine was getting slightly fed up but he simply shrugged it off and went back to the chicken legs . Over at team three's slot, Ten realized that they were running out of charcoal so he asked the Master if he would go and get another bag.

"OK, but don't you burn those chicken legs" the Master teased as Ten gave him a sarcastic laugh laugh.

"Very funny, now are you going to get some more charcoal or not?" Ten asked. The Master nodded and went round the back to were they kept all the charcoal. That was when he discovered a bag of gunpowder in the far corner and it gave him an idea, he was going to replace a bag of charcoal with that gunpowder and was hoping that team one would accidentally pick it up before picking up the bag of charcoal that Ten had asked for and returned to their slot.

"What took you so long?" Ten asked as he poured some fresh charcoal onto the barbecue "you haven't planted a bomb round there have you?"

"Me?" the Master asked, dramatically pointing to himself "never." Ten looked at him suspiciously before continuing to grill the chicken legs and not noticing the Master giggling silently to himself, knowing that team one would probably need to refill their barbecue with charcoal and would hopefully pick up the bag of gunpowder accidentally.

Back at team two's slot, Eleven realized that their charcoal was beginning to run out so he told Nine that he was going to nip round the back to get some more.

"Hurry up, these chicken legs won't hold out for long" Nine said as he prodded them with tongs, checking them to see how they were doing. Eleven then slipped round the back, picked a random bag without checking it and dragged it back to their slot.

"Here's the charcoal" he announced before pouring it onto the barbecue and that was when Nine realized that some powder was pouring out instead of little black rocks.

"Erm, that charcoal looks kind of powdery" Nine said as Eleven poured the last bit of powder on "are you sure it's charcoal."

"Yes, it says charcoal on the bag" Eleven said, showing him the bag "it's probably foreign charcoal or something." He then lit the match, threw it onto the grill and then...

KA-BOOM

The contestant where thrown from their slots as team two's barbecue exploded and that was when Nine realized that it wasn't charcoal, it was gunpowder.

"Someone has sabotaged our barbecue" Nine said in fury "someone had put gunpowder into one of the charcoal bags."

"Drat, that was supposed to be for team one to pick up" the Master said in annoyance before he noticed that everyone was looking at him and realized that he was busted.

"Well, I have to say it's been a real honour to be here today and I would...oh look, isn't that the queen." He then ran off before the others could possibly get hold of him and Ten was brushing his hair back in frustration.

"I am going to kill that little..." he said through gritted teeth as he stood up and brushed off some of the dirt that had stained his blue pinstriped suit, ignoring the gasps and shouts coming from the audience "I have the ultimate punishment for him, when I find him."

An hour later, the timelords where back at the apartment and the Master was sitting at the kitchen table, writing lines.

"Is this really necessary?" he asked "I mean, isn't writing lines kind of school punishment." He stared down at the notepad which had the words "I will not swap charcoal with gun powder" written down eighty seven times. Ten was sat across from him, making sure that he was carrying out his punishment.

"How many of these do I have to write anyway?" the Master asked.

"One hundred and forty three" Ten replied "and you're not leaving the table until you've done." The Master grumbled and folded his arms. It was going to be a long afternoon for him.

Coming up next, the timelords come back from a shopping trip to discover an intoxicated Dalek which has broken into their apartment and it refuses to leave. Will they be able to get rid of it, find out next time folks.


	11. The one with the drunken Dalek

The one with the drunken Dalek

A Dalek rolled down the street looking for people to exterminate when it came across a group of four teenage boys who seemed to be drinking alcohol and it decided to exterminate them.

When it arrived at the gang, the first one to notice it was a chubby boy who was dressed in a true chav fashion.

"Hey look, a giant pepper pot" he slurred, pointing at the Dalek and wobbling on the spot "do you want some booze mate?"

"YOU WILL BE EX-TER-MIN-ATED" the Dalek roared, raising it's lazer gun at the chubby chav.

"oh don't be like that mate, have a drink" said another one of the teenagers, walking up to the Dalek with a bottle of vodka.

"WHAT IS THAT STUFF AND WHAT DOES IT DO?" the Dalek asked, studying the bottle that the drunken teenage boy was holding.

"It gets you in a really good mood, go on, let's get some of it down you" and before the Dalek could react, the drunk somehow managed to open it's casing and fed the mutant inside the casing a large amount of vodka.

Elsewhere, the four timelords where out shopping and Nine was in a bad mood because he saw a shirt in one of the shops they had been to but they didn't have any in his size.

"Don't worry, we could come back next week and see if they have your size in" said Ten. Nine huffed and nodded.

Meanwhile, the now drunken Dalek was rolling down the street, making giggling noises and bumping into walls. It then rolled into the block of apartments where the four timelords where living, exterminated their front door and rolled in.

Back outside, the four timelords where on their way back to the apartment, unaware that a drunken Dalek had just broken into it.

"Check these out" said Eleven, showing off a pair of roller-skates he had bought "arn't they cool, roller-skates are cool." Ten smiled at his furture incarnation and nodded in agreement. When they arrived at their apartment, the first thing they noticed was that their door was blown off it's hinges.

"What the hell?" Ten muttered "I think we've had a break in." The four peered in and saw that nothing was taken, but the kitchen table had been knocked over and some cups had been smashed.

"Bloody hooligans by the looks of it" Nine pointed out. Ten then looked and saw a Dalek repeatedly knocking itself against the wall so he rushed into the flat and towards the Dalek.

"how did you get in here?" Ten asked.

"I EX-TER-MIN-ATED THE FRONT DOOR, WEEEHEEEHEE" the Dalek screamed before spinning around in circles, laughing as the timelords watched, confused.

"What the hell is wrong with it?" Eleven asked "I've never seen a Dalek act like this before."

"I don't know, but I think it's drunk" said Nine "which is impossible because I have no idea as to how it got like that." The Master however was finding it amusing and walked up to the Dalek who was now knocking things off the shelves.

"Hey, go up to him over there and ask him if he'll go on a date with you" he said, pointing at Ten who was picking up the kitchen table and putting it back where it was before. The Dalek then rolled up to Ten and tapped him with it's plunger.

"What do you want?" he asked.

"WOULD YOU LIKE TO GO ON A DATE WITH ME?" it asked. Ten looked horrified and almost fell over the table in shock.

"I would never go on a date with you, now why don't you just leave" Ten told it. Unfortunately, the Dalek refused and parked itself in front of the television, indicating that it didn't want to leave just yet.

"Great" said Ten, rubbing his forehead "now how are we supposed to get rid of this drunken over-grown pepper-pot."

"I HEARD THAT RAKE-FEATURES" the Dalek roared "NOW, SOME-BODY SWITCH ON THIS BOX DEVICE." Ten, who was now getting annoyed, marched up to the Dalek and stood in front of it.

"MOVE, YOU'RE BLOCKING THE VIEW, HIC, YOU SKINNY ABOMINATION" the Dalek yelled.

"Oh, he told you" the Master shouted "he told you big time pal." The Doctor ignored what the Master had said and focused his attention on the Dalek.

"You, out now" he barked "this is a timelord apartment and we do not allow Daleks in here." However, the Dalek still refused to budge and Ten gave up. He collasped onto the sofa and buried his face in his hands.

Later that afternoon,the Dalek was still refusing to leave the apartment and the three Doctors where trying to figure out a way on how to get rid of it, but the Master was finding it rather amusing that there was a drunken Dalek in the apartment and he seemed to be taking advantage of the situation.

"Hey, drunky, want some more beer?" he asked.

"Don't encourage it" Ten said "it's not staying, it's going right now because I refuse to allow an intoxicated Dalek to stay in this apartment."

"I AM NOT BUDGING" the Dalek barked before rolling into kitchen, knocking the coffee table in the process and opening the fridge door with it's plunger.

"What are you looking for?" Ten asked "if you're wanting more beer, we don't have any more beer." The Dalek then shut the door, turned round to face Ten and pointed it's ray gun at him.

"YOU WILL BE EX-TER-MIN-ATED" it shrieked, firing the lazer. Luckily, it had missed Ten by an few inches because it was too drunk to aim properly.

"Right, I think it's time for a meeting in the front room" Ten announced to the other three timelords "will someone please shut that Dalek in the broom cupboard first." Eleven volunteered and soon pushed the Dalek towards the broom cupboard.

"WHAT ARE YOU DO-ING YOU NERD?" it barked.

"We just need you out of the way for a bit because we are having a very important meeting and we don't want to disturbed ok" Eleven said as he pushed the Dalek into the broom cupboard and locked the door before joining the other three in the front room. Three of the timelords sat on the sofa together as Ten paced up and down in front of them.

"We have to get rid of it" he told them "it's being a complete nuisance and I think a drunken Dalek could be a lot worser than a sober Dalek."

"How do you think it got drunk?" Eleven asked "I mean, it's impossible for a Dalek to drink alcohol or anything."

"Maybe someone opened it's casing somehow and fed the mutant inside it some kind of alcoholic substance" Nine pointed out. Ten sighed and collasped onto the arm chair, rubbing his forehead in frustration, trying to figure out how to get rid of the Dalek, but it was impossible if it refused to leave.

"Maybe we could lure it out with this" Eleven suggested, waving a twenty pound note around " I could put it on the end of a fishhook, hide behind the front door and lure it out of the apartment." Nine looked at Eleven with a confused look and asked what on earth a Dalek would do with twenty pounds.

"It was just an idea" Eleven replied, looking sheepish. Suddenly, there was an almighty crash coming from the kitchen and the timelords turned round to discover that the Dalek had escaped from the broom cupboard.

"THE SERVICE IN THIS PLACE IS TERRIBLE" the Dalek screamed "I DEMAND BEER NOW!"

"How did you get out of the broom cupboard?" Ten asked "it was locked."

"I EX-TER-MIN-ATED THE DOOR" the Dalek bellowed, before spinning on the spot again, making giggling sounds again "WEEEEHEEEHEEE."

"That explains the crashing noise" Eleven pointed out. The Dalek then stopped spinning on the spot and started demanding more beer.

"I think they sell some in the shop down the street" the Master replied, heading to the front door, only to be pulled back by Ten.

"Oi, I was just about to get our guest some more beer" the Master told Ten as he dragged him into the front room "he's just having fun, that's all."

"You have got no idea what you are dealing with" Ten replied "that Dalek could be even more dangerous if it gets any more drunk. Now, you are not to leave this apartment and you are not to get anymore beer for the Dalek, got it?" The Master grinned and nodded before picking up a newspaper and reading it. Satisfied, Ten walked towards the Dalek with a very angry look on his face,.

"Now look here you, I have just had about enough of you loitering around here and I am only going to say this one last time...GET OUT NOW." The Dalek stared at Ten for about five minutes before finally answering him.

"NO." Ten looked really annoyed as the Dalek rolled back into the front room and parked itself in front of the Television.

"I WANT TO WATCH THE BOX DE-VICE" the Dalek barked. Ten pushed his hair back in a frustrated manner. It was going to be really hard to get rid of this drunken overgrown pepper pot. When the timelords went to bed, the Dalek was still holed up in the front room, watching television and Ten told it that he wanted it gone by the time he got up.

Later that night, Ten was woken up by really loud music coming from the front room. Grumbling frustration, he pushed the bedsheets back, climbed out of bed, pulled open the front door to see the Dalek was spinning on the spot to really loud music.

"WHAT ARE YOU STILL DOING HERE?" Ten shouted over the loud music "I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU TO LEAVE BEFORE I WENT TO BED." It wasn't long before Nine and Eleven were woken up by the loud noise.

"What's going on?" Eleven asked, leaning against the door frame in his bow-tie pyjamas.

"This Dalek is now having a party in our front room and-hang on, where's the Master" Ten said, noticing that the Master hadn't come out of his bedroom yet.

"I don't know" Nine replied in a grumpy tone "but i'm not bothered about that now, all I'm bothered about is going back to bed and not getting up for another six more hours." Just then, the Master came walking through the front door, carrying six cans of beer.

"The paper shop was closed but I got these from that 24 hour beer shop" he told the Dalek before noticing a very angry looking Ten looking at him.

"What do you think you are doing?" he asked the troublesome timelord "I thought I told you not to buy any more beer for the Dalek."

"It wasn't my fault, it made me go out and get the beer" the Master replied "bad Dalek, very very bad Dalek." Ten sighed and turned back to the Dalek again, more frustrated than ever.

NOW LOOK HERE NOW, I AM GOING TO ASK YOU THIS THE LAST TIME, LEAVE NOW." he screamed, face red with fury.

"Woah, you sure can shout" the Master said, covering his ears "I think I might be deaf now." Ten then marched up to the Dalek and started pushing it towards the front door.

"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DO-ING?" the Dalek roared.

"If you won't leave, then I'll make you leave myself" Ten replied as he pushed the Dalek out of the front door.

"HOW DARE YOU TREAT ME LIKE THAT" the Dalek roared, about to roll up to Ten, only to suddenly stop dead in it's tracks and shut down.

"What happened to it?" Eleven asked.

"I think the alcohol in it's system finished it off" Ten replied "well I'm not surprised with it being drunk most of the day." The four timelords then went back into the apartment and went back to bed.

"We're going to need someone to fix those doors" said Ten, indicating to the front door and the broom cupboard door that had been blown off their hinges by the Dalek "and I'll have to get someone out to fix them as soon as possible."

Coming up next, the timelords take a trip to McDonalds, that's to come next.


	12. The one where they go to Mcdonalds

The one where they go to McDonalds

A couple of days had passed since the incident with the intoxicated Dalek that had refused to leave the apartment and Ten had to have the front door repaired after the Dalek blew it off it's hinges. He got up one morning and walked into the kitchen to see the Master lying on top of the kitchen counter and Eleven taking a photo.

"What are you two doing?" Ten asked as he sat down at the kitchen table.

"It's this craze that the humans are doing" the Master replied "it's called planking." Eleven nodded in agreement with a cheesy smirk.

"And what is this planking thing then?" Ten asked.

"Blimey, you really need to get out more" the Master said "basically, it's where someone lies flat on their stomachs in a really unusual place with their arms pinned down their sides while another person takes a picture and then they put it up on the internet, so Eleven here was taking some pictures of me planking and then I'm going to put them up on facebook."

"But you don't have facebook" Ten said.

"I could make one, silly man" the Master replied as he jumped down from the kitchen counter and joined Ten at the kitchen table. Eleven and Nine joined them shortly and they where discussing what to do for the day.

"Hey, did you know that there's a new McDonalds that just opened yesterday" Eleven pointed out "I say we should go and try it out, it'll be cool." So, later that morning, the four timelords where making their way to the new McDonalds and when they arrived, they found it to be quite busy.

"Oh bloody hell" Nine complained "look at the line." Ten sighed and told him that they just had to patient and wait until it was their turn to get served.

"Right, has everybody decided what they're having?" Ten asked. The other three nodded and then joined the line, followed by Ten. After ten minutes of waiting, it was their turn to get served and Ten was up first.

"Good day sir and what can I get for you?" the woman behind the counter asked.

"Good day, may I have a medium cheese burger with medium fries and a cola please" Ten requested. After he got served, the Master made his way up to the counter and practically leaned across the counter.

"Good day sir and what can I get for you?" the woman asked.

"OK listen here, first things first , I am the Master and you will obey me. So, if you get my order wrong, then it won't be pretty" the Master told her.

"Sir, just tell me what you want and I'll get it" the woman said in a rather bored tone.

"OK, then I require a big mac with large fries and a large cola, oh and do you do oreos" the Master said.

"No, we do not sell oreos" the woman replied "so, big mac and large fries with a large cola it is then."

"Yes it is, good woman" the Master replied. The next to be served was Eleven and he ordered a happy meal with a chocolate milkshake and Nine got the same as Ten.

A few minutes later, the four timelords where sat down with their burgers and fries. Eleven was mucking around with the free miniature lightsaber he had got with his happy meal and he was waving it around, making whooshing noises and irritating Nine to hell.

"If you kindly can stop waving that thing around, then I will be very happy" Nine said "because it's starting to get on my nerves." Eleven then put the mini lightsaber away and took a bite out of his cheeseburger.

"Hey you guys, you won't believe this, but I heard some pretty gruesome stories about what they put in the food here" the Master whispered.

"Those are just rumours, they're not true" Ten pointed out.

"I wouldn't be too sure about that" the Master replied "because they are true, muhahahaha." Ten rolled his eyes and carried on eating his fries, but the Master seemed determined to tell them about what they supposedly put in the food at McDonalds.

"Did you know that the burgers contain worm meat" he said with an evil grin. The people at the next table heard what the Master had just said and they spat their burgers out and he seemed to be amused by this.

"No they don't, it's just one of those urban myths that's going around on the net, it is not true" Eleven replied, taking a drink from his chocolate milkshake.

"Did you also know that the chocolate milk they sell here contains cow's blood" the Master pointed out. In about two seconds, chocolate milk was being sprayed everywhere by the people who were drinking it, including Eleven and the Master grinned in amusement.

"Have you quite finished now?" Ten hissed "you're putting everyone off their food."

"Jeez Mr rake man, take a joke" the Master replied " I know that all that stuff isn't true." After a while, the timelords ordered a second helping of burgers and fries because they where selling them at half price.

"Bet by tomorrow they'll be selling them at full prices" Nine pointed out "stuff like this doesn't last forever."

"Well I read in the paper that they're selling stuff or half price all week until they put them up to their full prices" Eleven pointed out "so, it's only for a week." Ten nodded in interest and noticed that a small boy of about four years was walking up to their table and started staring at them.

"What's up with this kid?" the Master asked, gesturing to the four year old boy who was still staring at the four of them.

"He's probably wondering why four guys are sitting together or something like that" Nine said. The Master sighed and turned to the four year old boy.

"Do you want something?" he asked. The boy continued to stare at him, blinked a few times, scratched is nose but still continued staring until his mother came running up to him.

"Timmy, how many times have I told you not to stare at people" the woman said as she grabbed hold of the boy's hand and telling the timelords that her son had a habit of staring at people.

"Don't worry about it" Ten reassured her "he was probably just curious." The little boy's mother nodded and left the restaurant, taking her son with her. After the boy and his mother had left, the Master announced he was going to visit the men's room before they left.

"Well hurry up because we're going in a minute" Ten told him. The other three where sat waiting when they heard all the customers screaming and then saw the Master stood in the middle of the restaurant, wearing rubber gloves and dangling a dead rat by it's tail.

"Look what I found in the men's room" he said as the other three timelords ran over to him "this place has got rats."

"Where did you get the rubber gloves?" Ten asked,

"From the cleaning trolley that was in he men's room" the Master replied " I know that rats carry all sorts of diseases so I put these rubber gloves on before picking it up and showing everybody."

"Well put that rat down and let's get out of this rat infested place" Nine said. The Master tossed the rat aside, ignoring the screams of a woman as the rat landed in her coffee and walked out of the restaurant with the other three.

The next day, the McDonalds restaurant was closed down for rat infestation and it was soon in the papers.

"Well, it is a good job I noticed because some poor unfortunate human could have been served a rat burger" the Master pointed out. He, Ten and Eleven where all planking, Ten was on the kitchen worktop, Eleven on the kitchen table and the Master was on top of the fridge.

"Are you sure you don't want to try it out?" Eleven asked Nine who was stood there with the camera "just set the camera to take the photo by itself."

"Sorry, don't want to do that ridiculous human craze" Nine replied "but I'll take the photo and that's it." After he had finished, the photo was then published to an online planking sight where it showed various pictures of various people planking in some of the most unusual places like a man planking on top of a lampost.

"These humans, what will they think of next" Nine sighed as he saw a photo of two teenage girls planking on top of dustbins.

"Well there is another craze besides planking" the Master said.

"And what's that?" Nine asked, showing no interest.

"Owling" the Master replied "so, does anybody fancy owling next?" Nine sighed and admitted he was going to bed.

Coming next, the timelords go on a day trip with the mitchells to a theme park, that's all to come next.


	13. The one at the theme park

The one at the theme park

"Hey you guys guess what" Eleven said as he burst into the apartment one Friday morning "I've just bought us four tickets to the new theme park that's opening tomorrow." The other three timelords watched as the floppy haired, bow-tie wearing man sprinted into front room and handed them a ticket each.

"Are you saying that you want to go to this new theme park and you want us to come along?" Nine asked. Eleven nodded and told them it would be cool to go to a theme park and go on as many rides as they wanted.

"It says that there is a coach picking those up who purchased these tickets" said Ten as he read the back of his tickets "and it's tomorrow morning at nine am." Nine made a huffing noise and stared at his ticket before folding it up and putting it in his trouser pocket.

"OK, as no one tries to drag me on the kiddie rides, then I'll go" Nine pointed out before the others could try and pressure him into going "besides I could do with a laugh."

The next morning, the four timelords went down to the coach station and when they arrived, they found the Mitchell family waiting in the same queue.

"Hello" said James as they joined the line "are you four going to this new theme park then?" Ten nodded and asked James what the name of the park was.

"I think it's called cuckoo land or something" James replied "the girls found it quite amusing when I told the name." Both Charlene and Emily started laughing at the mention of the theme park's name and the Master also found it amusing.

"Whoever came up with a name like that is a genius" he pointed out "maybe I'll open my own theme park and call it death world." The others gave the Master a look of disapproval and he threw his hands up in defence.

"Hey, I was just kidding" he pointed out. They were waiting for at least half an hour until the couch finally arrived and the four timelords sat at the back with the Mitchell family.

"Cuckoo land here we come" Eleven shouted, resulting in him getting strange looks off the other passengers. He turned a slight shade of Scarlett and he picked up a newspaper, hiding behind it and hoping to avoid any contact with anyone else.

"So, do you four want to hang around with us at the park?" James asked "we could like go around in a group."

"Daddy, do you think people will find it a bit strange if eight people were walking around in a group?" Emily asked, giving her father a confused look. James patted the little girl on the shoulder and reassured her that no one will find it weird. It took almost two hours to arrive at the theme park and when they arrived, the people on the coach all climbed off and went into the car park plus the Master had fallen asleep half-way there and some kid who was sitting in the seat in front of him had drawn a fake moustache on his face. Ten was now attempting to wake him up which took a good five minutes.

"DIE" he yelled when he finally woke up and then saw Ten looking at him "what do you want?"

"We've arrived at the theme park" Ten told him "now are you going to get off the coach." After the two remaining passengers got off the coach, they joined the other two timelords and the Mitchell family.

"Right, shall we get going then?" Ten asked. The others nodded and they all went inside the park which was heaving with loads of people and Eleven got out the map for the entire park.

"Oh look, they've got an upside down roller-coaster" he pointed out "that should be interesting."

"You've got the map upside down you div" the Master pointed out before turning it the right way round "bloody hell, this is a big place isn't it." The first ride they decided to go on was the roller-coaster, unfortunately, Emily was too small to go on and Denise wasn't a big fan of roller-coasters so she told the others she would wait with Emily.

"Ladies and gentlemen, this roller-coaster is extremely deadly and we advise you all to keep your hands and feet in the ride at all times to avoid falling to a gruesome death" the Master said, imitating the voice over instructions that they kept repeating over and over again while they were waiting in the queue. Soon it was there turn to get on the roller-coaster and they all climbed into the separate compartments. As the ride was going around, Ten, the Master, Eleven and Charlene where the only ones who seemed the be enjoying it , the four of them had their arms up in the air, yelling "weeeeeeeeeeeeeee". Nine sat there with a bored expression and James looked a little queasy and felt like he wanted to hurl. After they had finished on the ride, James quickly dashed into the nearest rest room.

"Is he ok?" Denise asked.

"I think the ride made him feel a little sick" Ten pointed out. They had to wait for at least five minutes until he came out and he was looking a bit pale.

"Don't ever drag me onto one of those things again" he gasped, pointing at the roller-coaster "never again am I going on one of those." After the roller-coaster incident, the group decided to see what other rides there was until they came across the bumper cars.

"OK, if you want to go on the bumper cars, raise your hands" Ten said. Everyone raised their hands and Ten nodded.

"OK, two people will be sharing a car each" he continued. The group then got into the different cars. Ten shared one with Eleven, Nine shared one with Emily, Denise and James shared one, so that left the Master and Charlene to share one.

"Oh, this is going to be brilliant" he pointed out "I love bumper cars because you can slam into people." Unfortunately, there was a couple of hooligans in one of the cars and they were constantly slamming hard into the other people, causing their cars to spin around out of control plus people where finding it hard to dodge them because they kept chasing them and then bamming into their cars and the Master wasn't too happy when they rammed into the car that he and Charlene were in.

"Right, this means war" he said, grabbing the steering wheel and turning the car around before chasing after the two hooligans.

"What are you going to do?" Charlene asked as he drove at full speed towards the two teenage hooligans who were now driving away.

"Giving them a taste of their own medicine" the Master replied as he dodged in and out of the other bumper cars before he finally rammed into the two hooligans, sending their car spinning out of control.

"Ha ha, how do you like that. You pathetic hooligans?" he laughed after their car finally stopped spinning "maybe you'll think twice before you decide to mess with the Master." After they had been on the bumper cars, they decided to get some lunch and walked around the park trying to find a hot dog stand that wasn't over crowed with fussy people barging past each other so they could get the biggest hot dog.

"Are you sure you're up to having some lunch?" Ten asked James "or are you still feeling a bit queasy from the roller-coaster."

"I think I'll be OK" James replied. After looking around for a while, they finally found a hot dog stand that wasn't busy and after they had bought their hotdogs, they sat down on one of the benches.

"So, what else is there?" Eleven asked. Ten took out the map and looked at it to see what else there was in the park.

"There's the water log ride or we could try out the ghost train" he suggested "so, do you guys want to go on the water log ride or the ghost train?"

"Water log ride" Eleven said "don't like the sound of that ghost train." After they had finished their hotdogs, they went to the water log ride and the queue wasn't as bad as it was when they were waiting to go on the roller coaster. When it was there turn to get into one of the logs, they were all provided with raincoats as the ride would result in them getting soaked.

"I don't see why we have to wear these raincoats anyway, it's only water, not skin dissolving acid" Nine said as he climbed in behind Ten who was sat at the front.

"Maybe not everyone likes getting wet" he replied. When the ride started, it moved slowly at first and the Master didn't seem to impressed.

"This is boring" he complained "when does the fun stuff happen." After moving along the track, it came to a stop and then dropped down a steep hill which ended up in a huge splash.

"Now that is more like it" the Master laughed "now we're really getting soaked." By the time the ride was over, they all came off, dripping wet from head to toe.

"These raincoats where useless, I'm still bloody soaking wet" Nine complained as he took off his shoe and poured a huge amount of water from it.

"Oh it's only a bit of water" the Master replied with a smirk "it's not going to hurt you."

"A bit of water?" Nine asked "it's like I've just been chucked over niagra bloody falls." The Master chuckled and looked at the map.

"Oh looky here" he said with an evil grin "another water ride, the raging rapids, I say we should try out that one." Nine looked as though he had found out that the whole world was being ruled by sixty billion Masters.

"I'm already wet enough, I don't want to be even more wetter than I bloody already am" he replied. Ten sighed and walked up to Nine, telling him that he didn't have to go on the rapids if he didn't want to.

"Well fine, I'll just sit here and dry off" Nine replied, sitting on one of the benches.

"Are you sure you don't want to come on?" Charlene asked him. Nine shook his head and told her he didn't want to get any more wetter. So the group, except for Nine went on the raging rapids and climbed into the red round boat thing.

"Hey, I reckon we should all have a sing song" the Master suggested "what do you reckon?" Everyone agreed and soon they were all singing the theme song to sponge-bob square-pants repeatedly until the ride was over. The group then went back to where Nine was still waiting and found him still sat on the bench, eating candy floss.

"How was it?" he asked as they walked up to him. Emily pointed out it was amazing and that they sang the theme song to sponge-bob square-pants all the way through.

"And who's bright idea was it to sing that stupid song?" Nine asked Ten who pointed out that it was the Master who got them singing the sponge-bob square-pants theme song. After a good few more hours spend in the park, it was time to go home and they were now on the coach, on their way back to London.

"Well, that was a good day out wasn't it?" Eleven asked "I hope we can go again one day." When they arrived back to their aparmtent, Nine announced he was going to bed and wished not to be disturbed for the next sixteen hours.

"What's up with him?" Eleven asked as he walked into the kitchen to make some toaster waffles "he seems to be in a grump."

"That's because he is a grump" the Master replied, only to get a look of warning from Ten.

"So, do you three guys fancy a game of scrabble or something to pass the time?" Eleven suggested "or we could have a game of cards or something."

"I think a game of scrabble will do me" the master replied before going to fetch the scrabble board.

"Ok, as long as you don't spell out any rude words" Ten pointed out. The three time lords spend the next four hours playing scrabble before finally going to bed themselves.

Coming up next, Eleven buys a parrot and the Master decides to teach it some rude words. That's all to come up next time.


	14. The one with the rude parrot

The one with the rude parrot

The atmosphere was pretty boring one Tuesday morning in the timelord's apartment, Eleven had popped out to do a bit of shopping, Ten was in the kitchen, doing a fry up, Nine was sat in the living room, trying to read the newspaper but was finding it quite impossible to concentrate when the Master was continuously making popping noises in his ear hole.

"Can't you see I am trying to read the news paper?" he said in a very annoyed tone.

"Yes" the Master replied then continuing to make annoying popping noises until Nine shut his newspaper and walked into the kitchen.

"What's up with you?" Ten asked when he saw that Nine was looking really annoyed and bored.

"I was trying to read the newspaper, but I couldn't because a certain room-mate of ours was making annoying popping noises in my ear hole" he replied just as the Master entered the kitchen at sat down at the table.

"Are you two talking about me?" he asked "what have I done now?" Ten sighed as he put the contents of his fry up on his plate and joined the other timelords at the table.

"Nine told me that you was bugging him when he was trying to read the news paper " Ten told the Master who just put his hands up in defence and told Ten that he was bored. A couple of hours later, Eleven came back from shopping and the first thing the other three noticed was the bright green parrot on his shoulder.

"What the hell is that?" Nine asked, pointing at the parrot.

"It's a parrot, I have a parrot now, parrots are cool" Eleven replied "plus, I have also bought him a cage." He took out a large birdcage and put the parrot inside before putting it on the living room shelf.

"So, does it have a name?" Ten asked, looking at the parrot with deep interest.

"Yes, it's called DJ" Eleven replied with a grin. Nine looked at Eleven with confusion and asked him what it was short for.

"Doctor junior" Eleven replied "But I call Him DJ for short."

"Bow ties are cool, bow ties are cool" DJ squawked in his parrot voice. The other three turned to look at Eleven with confused expressions.

"Oh I taught him to say that on the way back" he replied "maybe I should pop down to the pet shop tomorrow and see if they sell bow ties for parrots."

"Maybe I'll get myself and call it Master junior" the Master suggested "MJ for short." Nine rolled his eyes and whispered to Ten that if he did go out and buy a pet, he'd probably come back with a Dinosaur or something.

"Now how can I get a Dinosaur if they don't exist any more?" the Master asked.

"Well, you could probably time travel to the Dinosaur times and then come back with a bloody T-rex on a leash and collar" Nine replied. The Master grinned in a sinister manner said pointed out that it wouldn't be such a bad idea.

"Don't even think about it" Ten told him in a warning tone "I think the parrot will be enough for now."

That night, the timelords were woken up by DJ squawking something which sounded like "your mom is a gallifreyan slapper." They all ran out of their rooms to find the parrot flapping it's wing and yelling "Daleks are stupid ass holes."

"Who's been teaching DJ to say those things?" Eleven asked just as DJ screamed out something which sounded like "coswollop."

"Well one of us must have been teaching it to say those things" Ten pointed out "and I don't think it would have heard the words gallifreyan slapper heard in the pet shop." They all looked at DJ who was now cleaning his feathers before telling them to "get bent." The three Doctors didn't look to impressed at what the parrot had just said, but the Master was finding it hilarious, causing Ten to look at him suspiciously.

"Hey, why are you looking at me like that?" he asked "what have I done?"

"Did you teach the parrot to say those things?" Ten asked, raising his left eyebrow.

"OK fine, I did" the Master admitted "it's just really boring sitting there, so I decided to teach it a few words."

"You've made it into a potty mouth" Eleven said in shock "what else did you teach him it to say?"

"Eat my gallifreyan shorts, stupid dumbass and skanky timelady" the Master replied with a grin "but that's all I have so far." Ten looked at him with disapprovement and told him not to teach DJ the parrot to say any more rude phrases.

When the three Doctors woke up the next morning, the first thing they saw was the Master stood in front of DJ's cage and teaching him to say some more rude phrases.

"Can you say Doctor dumbass?" he asked the parrot "come on, I know you can." He was then caught off guard when Ten placed his hand on his shoulder.

"Oh hello, I wasn't expecting you" the Master replied with a grin "so, what's the breakfast then Doc?"

"I thought I told you not to teach the parrot to say rude phrases" Ten said " now, will you please stop..." he was cut off by the loud squawking of the parrot who was now saying "Doctor dumbass, Doctor dumbass."

"I think he's talking to you" the Master said, only to get a stern look from Ten "OK, I'll just be in the kitchen if you need me." he then went into the kitchen and Ten turned to look at DJ who was just stood on his perch, staring at Ten who slowly made his way towards the cage.

"Does polly want a cracker?" he asked.

"Polly says get bent" the parrot relied, almost knocking Ten right out of his socks.

Later that morning, Nine was sat on the sofa reading the newspaper when all of a sudden he heard "Big eared Twit, big eared twit." He looked up and realize that it was DJ who was saying it whilst flapping it's wings about, so he got up and walked towards the bird cage.

"Were you just talking to me?" he asked the parrot who started squawking the words "big eared twit" again. Grumbling, Nine sat back down on the sofa and picked up his newspaper just as the Master entered and sat next to him.

"What's up with you, you've got a face like a smacked backside" he pointed out when he noticed that Nine was in a grump.

"That...bird just called me a big eared twit" Nine replied in frustration before continuing to read his newspaper.

"Oh yeah, I taught him to say it earlier" the Master replied, feeling proud of himself. Nine slowly put the newspaper down and looked at the Master, dangerously.

"What did you say?" he asked in a dangerous tone.

"I taught the parrot to call you a big eared twit" the Master replied, smiling. Slowly, Nine got up from his seat and walked towards the troublesome timelord who also stood up and began to back away.

"Nine, what are you doing?" the Master asked as Nine backed him into the kitchen "don't do something you might regret." They were circling each other around the kitchen table and Nine still had that dangerous look on his face.

"Come on, it was only a joke" the Master explained "wow, you really are pissed off aren't you."

"I do not like it when my ears are insulted" Nine replied, throwing a dish cloth at the Master who managed to duck in time.

"Well, you do have large ears" he replied before dodging a pair of oven mittens " I mean, come on, look at them." Another dish cloth came flying in his direction and he managed to duck again.

"No one makes fun of my ears" Nine said. He was about to throw an egg when Ten walked in and saw what was going on.

"What's going on here then?" he asked. Nine put the egg down and explained to Ten that the Master had taught DJ to call him a big eared twit.

"Well I don't think throwing eggs about will solve the matter" Ten replied "now, go in the room and read your newspaper." Nine nodded and walked back into the living room.

"And you" Ten said to the Master "can't you stop tormenting him for at least five minutes?" The Master grinned and shook his head. Ten sighed in annoyance and rubbed the side of his head before telling him that teaching the parrot rude phrases had to stop now.

"But it's less boring if it's squawking out words like that" the Master replied "and it's hilarious."

Ten rolled his eyes and walked out of the kitchen.

A couple of days had passed by and not one rude phrase was heard from DJ the parrot apart from the odd "bow ties are cool" that Eleven had taught him when he first bought him back to the apartment.

"So, why aren't we hearing any more rude phrases from the parrot?" Nine asked.

"Oh, I ran out of some new rude phrases so I decided to give up" the Master replied "but I think I'll stick to tormenting it with a piece of cracker." He then proceeded to do so while the other three talked about other pets.

"What pet do you think we should get next?" Eleven asked "how about a dog or a cat or maybe a hamster."

"How about an Elephant" the Master suggested "it could join Nine's big eared fan club." Nine looked annoyed by this.

"Oi, watch it or I will throw that egg at you" he replied in frustration.

"Woah, take it easy, I was kidding" the Master replied, throwing his arms up in defence before continuing to tease DJ the parrot.

Coming up next, the timelords time travel to when the first Harry potter movie came out and go to see it at the cinema, that's all to come next.


	15. The one where they go to the cinema

The one where they go to the cinema

"Who fancies going to see a film?" Ten asked his fellow timelords one morning "I haven't been to the cinema in a long time, so what do you say?." The other three looked at him like he had just grown an extra head on his shoulder with arms growing out of the ears and three tongues hanging from the mouth.

"What's on?" Eleven asked as he fed his pet parrot "anything good because if you choose a really boring looking film, then I'm not going." Ten grinned again and suggested they should go and see the first Harry potter movie because he had always wanted to see it on the big screen.

"Hang on a minute, didn't that film come out like ten years ago?" the Master pointed out. Ten raised an eyebrow and pointed out that they could travel back to when Harry Potter and the Philosopher's stone was being shown in the cinemas. Nine rolled his eyes and asked why they couldn't have just rented the DVD instead of travelling all the way back to the year 2001 to see it but the Master and Eleven both seemed interested with the idea of going back in time to when Harry Potter and the Philosopher's stone was first released on the big screen.

"OK, I see that two of you are very interested with this idea, but one of you seriously needs to stop being grumpy and have some fun for once" Ten said as he looked directly at Nine who was reading the newspaper yet again "what do you say Nine, fancy a trip to the cinema?." Nine sighed and reluctantly agreed to go along with them, but only because he didn't want to be bugged into going.

"OK, so how does tomorrow sound, we could travel back to when it first aired in the cinemas" Ten suggested.

The next morning, the four of them where up early and nine was not in the best mood about being made to get up at seven in the morning.

"Please tell me why we have to be up so early?" he complained "we are going in a time machine, it's not like we have to catch a bus." Ten nodded in agreement and then said he wanted to get everything sorted first before they set off before asking Eleven to make sure that the Tardis was all set for travelling.

"Hey, if there's some moron with a fat head sitting in front of us, can I throw popcorn at his stupid fat head?" the Master asked Ten who didn't reckon much to that idea and said that popcorn was for eating, not tossing.

"But it's traditional to throw popcorn at people in a cinema" the Master replied with a smirk. Ten rolled his eyes and went to find some decent shoes to wear because his other pair where slightly filthy. About an hour later, the four timelords where all in the Tardis and Ten was making checks, making sure that everyone was there and asking anyone if they needed to use the bathroom before they go.

"Do you mind if I just make a quick trip, I drank a large bottle of fruit juice before we set off and now my bladder feels like it's about to burst" Eleven said "I like fruit juice, fruit juice is cool."

"Is there anything you don't find cool" Nine muttered sarcasticly from behind his newspaper and totally oblivious to the Master stood behind him, sticking two fingers up over his head to make him look like a devil.

"OK" Said Ten "but do hurry because I can't wait any longer to see the very first harry potter movie on the big screen."

"Well, how about I use the Tardis toilet, that way you can still set off instead of waiting for me" Eleven suggested.

"OK" Ten replied. As Eleven legged it to the Tardis toilet, Ten set the coordinates for sixteenth of November 2001 and it only took them five minutes to get there.

"OK, I think the cinema should be around here somewhere" Ten said as they stepped out of the Tardis "I set the coordinates for the Tardis to park just near the cinema so we shouldn't be too far from it." He locked the Tardis doors and then the four walked down a street before turning a corner to see loads of people stood outside the cinema.

"Bloody hell, look at all those people" Nine commented as they joined the long queue which seemed to go on forever and Ten was checking that they all had their tickets on them.

"How did you manage to get hold of these tickets because they don't sell these tickets where we come from?" Eleven asked as he looked at his ticket which said the name of the movie and the price of the ticket.

"Ah, did I mention that I travelled back in time to when the tickets where first on sale" Ten replied "and I bought four of them. Do you remember that day when I went out to buy milk and eggs, well I did get the milk and eggs as well as the tickets." After two hours of waiting in line, the four timelords finally got inside the cinema and after showing their tickets and getting the popcorn, they all went into screen six where Harry potter and the Philosopher's stone was being shown.

"Look, there's some seats over there" Eleven said, pointing to a row of empty seats in the middle and by the time the four of them were seated, the room was almost packed and a few of these people included a class of ten year olds who were on a school trip, a Spanish man, a married couple with their three year old, some youths, four seven foot tall men plus many others. The seven foot tall men thought it would be a good idea to sit in front of the four timelords, blocking their view and none of them seemed to happy about it.

"Great, now how am I suppose to watch the film with these giants blocking our view" Nine complained.

"Excuse me fellas" the Master said to the four seven foot tall men "but me and my friends would really appreciate it if you could sit elsewhere because we cannot see the screen, unless you all want to suffer a slow and painful death." They all looked at him for a few seconds before one of them replied with "why don't you make us move" and refused to budge, so the Master took out his laser screwdriver and pointed it at the four seven foot tall men.

"You see this here?" he asked them "this is a laser screwdriver and it's very very deadly, now, I suggest that the four of you shift or I will show you what this laser screwdriver can do to ignorant morons like yourselves. Now are you going to move or am I going to have to laser you four to death." Scared now, the seven foot tall men moved and the timelords could see the screen again.

"We really appreciate you getting to move those tall men for us" Ten said "but can you please put that away before we get thrown out."

"Okey dokey doccy" the Master said as he put the laser screwdriver away "now where is that idiot with the fat head because I've got the urge to throw some popcorn."

"There isn't any fat heads in here, sorry to disappoint you" Nine replied. Just then, a fat man walked into the room and sat in front of the four timelords, but he was short so he didn't block their view.

"What was that you were saying about no fat heads being in here because I slightly miss-heard you" the Master said before tossing some popcorn at the back of the fat man's head which he didn't react very kindly to.

"Sir, can you please stop throwing popcorn at me" he said in a heavy German accent.

"Oh it's not me" the Master replied and then pointing at Nine "it was him, I tried stopping him, but he overpowered me, bad boy."

"I am going to kill you later" Nine hissed as the Master just smirked at him and then took out a marker pen before writing "Kick me, I am a fat head" on the back of the fat man's head.

"That better not be a permanent marker" Ten whispered "because I don't thing that man would be too happy with having that written on the back of his head and not being able to wash it off."

"Hey at least I'm giving him a free tattoo" the Master replied "maybe I should write I am also a Nazi on there as-well." Ten snatched the marker pen from him and put it in his pocket, admitting that he was confiscating it.

"You spoil sport" the master grumbled, only to get a slight whack from the old man in the seat above him with his walking stick.

"Will you shut you mouth, the film is about to start" the old man snapped rudely

"I'd be careful with that if I was you wrinkles, it might snap in half" the Master replied in a slightly annoyed tone before Ten told him to stop it.

"What?" the Master mouthed before turning to face the screen where the film had just started. They were almost an hour into the film and during that time, the Master was making comments about what was happening in the film and the characters in it.

"Is it me or does that Dumbledore fella have a frog stuck in his throat because it sure sounds like it" he pointed out "seriously, someone give that guy some throat sweets and then maybe his voice wouldn't sound all frogified." The fat German man in front turned around and told the Master to shut up or he will have him thrown out.

"Oh do shut up you fat Nazi" the Master commented "and please could you move elsewhere, you're beginning to scare the children." He received a kick on the leg from Ten, indicating that he wanted him to be quiet. The Master hadn't said anything during the rest of the film until the scene where Voldemort first appeared.

"Oh my god, that is the most ugliest thing I have ever seen" he yelled and getting another whack from the old man's walking stick in response.

"I really wish you would stop doing that wrinkles" the Master said, only to get another whack "OK, will someone please remove this abusive pensioner, he's assaulting me with his walking stick."

"Well maybe if you stopped calling him wrinkles, then maybe he wouldn't have to keep hitting you with his walking stick" Ten replied. After the movie had finished, the four timelords made their way back to the tardis and they were talking about the movie.

"I never expected that Quirrell was the one after the stone" Eleven commented "I'd was expecting it it to be Snape, he seemed like the type."

"I know, it's always the one you least expect" Ten said as they walked into the Tardis "anyway, I think we shouldn't visit the cinema for a while, too busy." He then set the coordinates to take them back home

Coming up next, It's Halloween and the timelords dress up and go trick or treating with the Mitchell family, that's all to come next folks.


	16. The halloween special

The Halloween special

It was the Thirty first of October and Ten was in the kitchen making some Zombie biscuits and Eleven was also in the kitchen, giving him a hand.

"So, are these for the kids who will come trick or treating on our front door?" Eleven asked as he put the second batch in the oven "well I guess we are being creative for this years Halloween." At that moment, Nine walked into the kitchen and sat himself down at the table, watching as Ten decorated the Zombie biscuits with icing and Eleven keeping an eye on the oven.

"I don't really see the point of Halloween" Nine muttered as he stared at the jack-o-latern in the middle of the table.

"What's wrong, do you not like Halloween?" Ten asked. Nine shook his head and said that he wasn't really a halloween person before heading to the fridge to help himself to a cola.

"At least someones already in the mood for Halloween" Eleven pointed out as he watched the Master in the front room, dressed in a Freddy Krueger costume and dancing to Thriller. He was also singing to it aswell, but changing some of the lyrics, making up his own as he went along.

" Coz this is thriller, thriller night, I am the Master in a Freddy Krueger costume" he sang. Eleven was trying very hard not to burst out laughing before heading back into the kitchen to check on the second batch of zombie biscuits which were still baking in the oven.

"These biscuits are starting to smell nice" Eleven pointed out as he watched them bake away in the oven "bet they're going to taste as good as they smell."

"Yes but don't eat too many, they are for the kids" Ten said just as the Master entered the kitchen and saw the zombie biscuits on the counter.

"I thought something smelled nice in here" he pointed out before helping himself to one "so, is any of you lot going trick or treating tonight, I know I am or maybe I'll go around and scare the kids going around ."

"I don't think that will go down well " Nine pointed out " parents don't tend to react kindly to people who frighten their kids."

"The second batch is done" Eleven pointed out.

"Ok, well get them out of the oven then and put them on the counter" Ten said "we need to make more of these because we could get alot of kids knocking on the door." A couple of hours had passed by and Ten and Eleven had finished making the zombie biscuits which were now in a bowl on the side, ready for the kids who would come trick or treating to their apartment.

"So, are any of you three going to dress up in any costumes?" the Master asked the three Doctors "or maybe nine doesn't need a costumne, his face can easily scare little kids without a werwolf mask."

"Oh shut up" Nine said as the Master just grinned at him "anyway, I don't really see anything remotely scary about halloween, it's just where a bunch of kids go around in silly costumes, knocking on people's doors and getting candy and money." Eleven emerged from his room, dressed in a werewolf costume and looking rather proud of it aswell. Nine shook his head in dispair, he feltl ike he was surrounded by a bunch of immature fools.

"See what I mean" he said, pointing at Eleven's werewolf costume "what the hell are you supposed to be anyway."

"I'm a werwolf, werewolfs are cool" Eleven replied with a smile before asking Ten what he was going to dress up as.

"I might dress up as a vampire" Ten said "I got that Dracula outift from when I went to transylvania in the nineteenth centrury."

It was now getting to nightime and the four timelords where all dressed in costumes and Nine was pretty reluctant to be wearing a frankenstein's monster costume but Ten seemed quite impressed with his vampire costume, Eleven was still in his werwolf costume and the Master was still in his freddy krueger costume but now he had a glove on his right hand with grey plastic knifes sellotaped on.

"Did you make that glove thing yourself?" Eleven asked.

"Yeah, I wanted the actually glove from the films but I couldn't find any, so I made one myself" the Master replied, showing off the glove with a big grin on his face. Just then, the doorbell rang and Ten who was excited that it might be the first trick or treaters, picked up the bowl of Zombie biscuits and made his way to the door. When he opened it, there stood Charlene and Emily dressed up as witches accompanied by James and Denise who were the only ones not dress up.

"How come you two arn't in costume?" Ten asked as he gave the two girls a Zombie biscuit each.

"We don't really dress up, we're taking the girls round trick or treating" James replied "we do it every year."

"Why can't we just go on our own?" Charlene complained "I'm not five years old."

"I know, but there's alot of dodgy people on the streets, especially this time of year, but you and Emily can go on your own next year ok." Charlene nodded before she and Emily went to the next house.

"So, do you guys fancy going trick or treating or something?" James suggested "seeing as the four of you are already in costume."

"Ok, that does sound good" Ten replied.

"But what about the zombie biscuits?" Eleven asked "I thought you were giving them to the trick or treaters."

"I am, but I'll put them in a bag, stick it on the front door and leave a note saying that no one is home, help yourself to a zombie biscuit" Ten explained "then the four of us can go trick or treating."

"Just hold on a minute, I need to get something" the Master said before going into the kitchen and coming out a second later holding a box of eggs.

"What on earth are you doing with them?" Ten asked, nodding at the box of eggs.

"I'm going to throw them at people's houses" the Master replied "you see, it's a halloween tradition, if no one answers the doors or they don't give you anything, you throw eggs at their houses to teach them a lesson."

"There will be no egg throwing tonight" Ten pointed out firmly "now put those eggs back now."

"Ok if you insist" the Master replied with a grin before heading back into the kitchen to put the eggs back. Ten then placed the Zombie biscuits in a plastic bag, nailed it to the front door and left a note on top saying _No one is in as we have gone trick or treating, but please feel free to take a zombie biscuit_ before the four timelords went along with the Mitchell family to go trick or treating.

Somewhere in the street, totally unoticed by the costumed children running around with their bags full of candy, a wrinkled old figure who was in something that looked like the base of a Dalek was rolling around the street when it came to a nearby house before rolling to it and banging on the door.

"Open this door now, I demand candy, open up I say, I, Davros, command you to open this door right now and give me candy" he raged in fury but no one answered so Davros decided to go to the next house.

Meanwhile, the Mitchell family and the timelords had already been to five different houses and were now coming up to the next one. Charlene knocked on the door and a very grumpy looking old man answered.

"Trick or treat" the two girls said as they held out their candy bags. However, the old man was incredibly rude.

"Go away, I haven't got anything for you snotty nosed little brats" he snarled before slamming the door on them.

"Well that was just unbelievable" Ten pointed out "oh well, I guess the next house will be a little less ruder." The group then made their way to the next house, not noticing that Davros had just rolled past them to demand more candy from another random house.

"One two, freddy's coming for you, three four, better lock your door" the Master sang as they approached the next house. The two girls both knocked on the door and this time, no one answered despite the fact that the lights where still on.

"Daddy, someone's in there and they're not answering" Emily pointed out. Jmaes then walked up to the house and looked to see another miserable looking old man who was shouting and waving his walking stick about.

"Let's go, we got a headcase in there" James said as he grabbed hold of both girl's hands and ran down the path just as a tv remote came flying out of the window followed by angry yells of "don't come back here again."

"Woah, someone forgot to take their anti-stress medication today by the looks of it" the Master said in amusement "I wonder if i can make him flip out even more."

"Don't even think about it" Ten sighed, but the Master was already heading up to the door with a devious expression on his face before raising his fist and knocking four times and then waiting for the angry reactions from the angry old man inside.

"Will you kids stop bothering me or I will come out there and hit me with my walking stick" the crazy old man yelled. Snickering, the Master knocked on the door again and the old man again, went crazy and he continued bothering the old man before Ten told the Master to stop so they could continue on to the next house.

"Ok, but annoying that old man has really paid off" the Master said as he re-joined the group so they could go to the next house where the people who lived there were not so rude or crazy like the two old men they had encountered.

"Nice to see there are some decent people in this neighbour hood" James said as they walked down the street, only to bump into Davros who was coming round the corner.

"What are you doing here?" Ten asked in horror.

"I am going trick or treating" Davros snarled "but no one is answering the door to me, even though I ordered them to do so."

"Well I don't think no one will answer if you are forceful and demanding" James said.

"Oh do be quiet you pathetic human being" Davros barked.

"How on earth did you get here anyway?" Nine asked "you haven't moved int the nieghbour hood with your little band of Dalek minions have you?"

"No, I transported myself here from the mothership. When I heard about this so called Halloween tradition, I decided to take part in it myself and I am not giving up until i get more candy" he declared.

"But you do know it's for only night. So what are you going to do if you don't get any candy tonight?" the Master asked in a taunting voice.

"Silence" Davros roared. There was about five minutes of akward silence before Eleven spoke up first.

"So, errr, how are you Davros?" he asked.

"Mind your own buisness fool" Davros snarled before he turned around and rolled down the street.

"Well that is something you don't see everyday" Ten pointed out "so, shall we continue on?" A few hours had passed by and both Charlene and Emily's candy bags were almost full, despite that they had already eaten some of the candy they had been given.

"Don't eat all the candy, save some for tomorrow" Denise told the girls as they ate some chocolate they had been given. It was almost midnight and the group was on their way back to the apartment when they had another encounter with Davros who seemed tob e really annoyed.

"Oh, hello Davros " Ten said in a calm manner.

"Don't you hello me, I demand that those two brats give me their candy" Davros roared, pointing at Charlene and Emily.

"Ok, Davey, time for you to take a roll down this hill" the Master said before he began to push Davros to a nearby hill which led into a ditch.

"My name is Davros and what do you think you are doing, get your hands of me at once" Davros commanded, but the Master ignored him and pushed him down the hill and into the ditch below before dusting his hands and walking off.

"How dare you treat me like this, you haven't seen the last of Davros, I shall return" Davros declared, shaking his fist "Dalek mothership, beam me up." A bright light emitted to the ground and Davros was beamed up to the Mothership. back in the apartment, the timelords where returning to their apartment and Ten noticed that the bag on the door that contained the Zombie biscuits was now empty.

"Oh look, I guess alot of people came here and helped themselves to a zombie biscuit" Ten said before he noticed a new note over his saying _ you should be careful not to leave your biscuits unattended signed, a biscuit thief._

"Ok, guess someone helped themselves to the whole lot" Ten said "well, at least we could always make some more if we want." The four timelords then went back into the apartment and began discussing what halloween was really about.

"I'm still keeping my opinion, just a bunch of kids running around in costumes, knocking on people's doors and getting candy" Nine pointed out.

"No it isn't, halloween is when the dead rise from their graves, stalk through the streets and feast on the flesh of the living, bwuahahahahaha" the Master said, making a scary face and holding up a torch for effect.

"Well I didn't see any dead people walking through the streets, wanting to feast on the flesh of the living" said Ten.

"Would have been awesome though, I could have tripped one up and see if they broke into pieces" the Master said.

"You've been watching too much horror movies" Ten pointed out.

"I know, I love them" the Master replied "especially the Freddy Krueger ones." After a while, the timelords had finished their discussion on halloween and went to bed. Ten was about to close his eyes when he heard a noise outside his door, a kind of moaning zombie like noise which seemed to scare him but didn't know that it was the Master stood outside his door again, making those noises just to wind him up.

"Woaaaaaaaaaaaah, I have risen from my grave, I have come to feast upon your flesh, woaaaaaaah" he said before snickering and heading back into his own room.

Coming up next, the Master gets a job as a Pizza delivery person, will he do it right or just cause mayhem again, find out in the next chapter.


	17. The one with the pizzas

The one with the pizzas

A couple of weeks had passed by since Halloween and three of the Timelords where sat in the kitchen having breakfast when the Master walked in, grinning away to himself.

"What are you so happy about?" Ten asked as the troublesome timelord joined them at the table, still grinning happily like something really evil had happened to the world and told the others that he had just got a new job, as a pizza delivery person.

"How did you manage to get a job as a Pizza delivery person?" Eleven asked "you haven't had any experience with that sort of thing."

"Hey, I was the Prime minister, I'm sure I can deliver a few pizzas" the Master replied "it was quite easy to get the job, especially if you hypnotized the manager."

"You hypnotized the manager into giving you the job?" Ten asked in shock "wouldn't it be better just to make a CV and have the interview."

"Hey, at least I'm doing something good for a change" the Master protested "besides, I don't need a CV or do silly interviews to get a job, I can just hypnotize people into giving me the job." He then smirked at the three Doctors and helped himself to Nine's coffee when he wasn't looking.

"So, when do you start?" Eleven asked as Nine returned to the table and discovered that his coffee had all gone.

"Tomorrow" the Master replied with a grin. Ten nodded and finished his coffee before heading into the front room to see what was on the tv and was soon joined by Eleven who had come in to feed DJ the parrot.

"Do you really think the Master is capable of delivering pizzas, you know he can be troublesome" Eleven said as he joined his previous incarnation on the sofa.

"Well, he might be able to pull it off if he doesn't poison the pizzas or post them through people's letter boxes" Ten replied as the Master walked into the room and he had just heard what Ten had just said.

"Now why on earth would I put poison on pizzas, I might want to eat some myself, but I do like the thought of posting them through people's letter boxes" the Master replied with a grin. Ten sighed and told him that people wouldn't like it if he posted their food through the letter box.

"I know, but it does sound hilarious" the Master replied with a snicker "I can just see the person's face when they see their pizza coming through the letter box" he then burst into maniacal laughter at the thought but managed to control himself and joined the other two on the sofa.

"So, where's Nine?" Eleven asked.

"Oh, he's sulking in the kitchen because I drank his coffee" the Master replied "take a look yourselves." Ten and Eleven leaned over the sofa to see Nine sat at the kitchen table in a sulk.

"Poor fellow, that cup of coffee must have been his only friend in the world" the Master pointed out.

"Oh do shut up" Nine yelled from the kitchen as the Master giggled and pointed out he was only joking. Nine rolled his eyes and went to make himself another coffee because he had enough of sulking. The next morning, the Master was up before the others because he had to be at the pizza place by eight in the morning and when he arrived, he was greeted by the manager.

"Hello sir, I'm on time just as you said" the Master replied cheerfully "so, have we had any deliveries this morning?"

"Yes, I have a list of people who have placed an order and the name of the pizza they ordered is listed next to the name" the manager said as he handed the master a list of deliveries he had to make.

"Hang on, Torchwood has ordered a pizza?" he asked in horror when he saw the name Torchwood on the list with pepperoni pizza listed on the side "didn't know handsome freak Jack and his little club ate pizza, I thought they'd be too busy fighting some slimy alien."

"What are you talking about ?" the manager asked.

"Oh nothing sir, I'm just yapping away" the Master replied "so, where are the pizzas then?" the manager pointed to the room where the pizzas where and the Master went into the room to see the pizzas already bagged and boxed but before he set off to do the deliveries, he decided to add a little extra something to Torchwood's pizza because he loved winding up Jack and his team so he rooted around the room to see if he could find something to add to their pizza and when he found a bottle of laxativ, a devious grin spread across his face.

"Oh this will do nicely" the Master said before taking the bottle and pouring the whole amount onto the pizza with an evil grin. After he had finished, he gathered up the bag full of pizzas and told the manager he was off to do the deliveries.

"Ok, good luck" the manager said. The Master gave him a wave before setting off to deliver the first pizza which was the one for Torchwood and the Master started giggling at the thought of Captain Jack and his little gang eating the pizza and then being unable to leave the toilet. When he arrived there, he knocked on he door and Jack was the one who answered it, but he didn't seem to happy to see who was delivering his pizza.

"You" the American said in horror "what are you doing here?"

"Good day freak, I have come to deliver the pepperoni pizza that you ordered" the Master replied "you did order the pepperoni didn't you because I can always take it back if it's the wrong one."

"Of course I ordered the pepperoni, I just didn't expect that you would be the one delivering it" Jack replied "so what's your plan this time, you planning to enslave the human race by using your mind controlling pizzas?"

"No, I'm just delivering ordinary pizzas " the Master replied "I'm being a good boy this time. So, you want this pizza or not."

"Sorry, not if your delivering it, knowing you, you probably poisoned it or something" jack replied.

"Well that wouldn't be a big deal for you because if you died then you'll just come back to life in about three seconds" the Master pointed out.

"Yes, but the others can't come back to life" Jack replied "good day Master." He then shut the door and the Master put the pizza on the floor.

"Ok, well, it's outside the door of you change your mind and you can send the payment to the manager" the Master said before heading off to deliver the rest of the pizzas. After he was out of sight, Jack opened the door, looked around before picking up the pizza, dipped his finger in the sauce and licked it to make sure it wasn't dodgy but he couldn't taste anything dodgy, not even the laxativ so he took it into the base. Meanwhile, the Master was making his way to make another delivery and this time it was for a man called Jimmy the wrestler who was known by all the people in his street as a real hard man but the Master didn't seem scared because he had done alot worse than whatever this wrestler guy did and probably thought he wasn't really that much of a hard man but when he got to his house, he realized he was wrong because Jimmy the wrestler looked like he would frighten a small child or old lady just by looking at them.

"What do you want?" he asked in a thick cockney accent.

"Pizza" the Master replied "you did order the big touch chicken and ham." Jimmy the wrestler snarled and grabbed the pizza.

"So, is it the right one?" the Master asked. Jimmy the wrestler didn't say anything, instead he shoved the whole pizza in his mouth and then ripped the box in half.

"Ok, I see you enjoyed that, can I interest you in our new menu?" the Master asked, showing Jimmy the wrestler the new menu who just grabbed it from him and tore it into little pieces.

"No, now get outta it" Jimmy the wrestler snarled. The Master threw up his arms and slowly back away from the mean looking hard man before continuing to deliver some more pizzas and the next person was someone called Susie martin who just lived up the road from Jimmy the wrestler. By the time the Master arrived at her house, he knocked on the door and it was answered by a little girl who looked about nine years old.

"Hello are your parents home?" the Master asked the small girl who nodded her head and went to fetch her mum who looked like a pure chav.

"Alright" the girl's mum said " you here to deliver the pizza?"

"Yes" the Master replied. The woman took the pizza from him and then telling her daughter to get some plates. After Delivering nearly all the pizzas, the Master had one more Pizza to deliver and it was addressed to some caravan which was located in a field just up the road from the street he had been doing deliveries in.

"Probably some hippies or something" he muttered to himself as he walked up to the caravan which looked pretty familiar to the Master but he just couldn't think where he had seen it but he shrugged it off before walking up to the caravan and knocking on the door before the person who was in the caravan answered it and the Master seemed to recognize him straight away, he had slick black hair and a goatee.

" Are you the pizza delivery person?" he asked "because if you are then I am the Master and I command you to hand over the pizza this instance." The Master nodded as he gave the bearded Master the pizza.

"Oh this is just brilliant" the Master said to bearded Master "I didn't expect to be running into you." The bearded Master gave the other Master a confused look and asked him how he knew who he was.

"Oh, I do indeed, I know who you are but you don't know who I am" the Master told bearded Master before turning to leave and then turning back round again "and another thing, I think you should try running for prime minister in the future, you never know, you could end up becoming ruler of the worlds and enslaving the human race." Bearded Master let out a sinister chuckle and pointed out he liked the sound of that idea before going back inside the caravan which was actually his Tardis because as soon as he closed the door, it began to dematerilalise. When the Master arrived back at the shop, he was greeted by the manager who seemed to be pretty angry.

"Hello sir, I've delivered all them pizzas" the Master said with a grin. The manager however told him that he needed a word with him and told him to step into his office.

"Ok, but I want a promotion" the Master said as he walked into the office and sat down in a chair. It wasn't long before the manager sat in the chair opposite him and then pointed out that he had a complained from someone called Captain Jack harkness, saying that he and his team were unable to leave the toilets for about two hours after eating the pizza.

"Oh that is priceless" the Master chuckled "what happened, did the pizza give them bad gas."

"Enough with the fart jokes, they then carried out some tests on the pizzas and found large amounts of laxativs on it" the manager pointed out as the Master continued laughing insanely, tears falling down his cheeks and clutching his sides.

"Can you please control yourself" the manager said in annoyed tone as the Master fell out of his chair in a giggling fit "if you don't control, yourself right now, I will forceably remove you from the building."

Back at the apartment, the three Doctors where sat watching the tv when the Master walked in.

"Hello, how was your first day on the job?" Ten asked as the Master joined them in the living room.

"Brilliant, I delivered loads of pizzas and I met one of my past selves" the Master pointed out happily.

"How on earth did you manage to run into one of your past selves?" Eleven asked.

"He ordered a pizza and I delivered it, come to think of it, I do remember coming here with my tardis disguised as a caravan and ordering a pizza but I never knew back then that the person deilvering it was my future self" he explained "still, it was good but I've been fired." Ten let out a sigh and asked what he had done this time.

"I delievered a pizza to Captain Jack and his torchwood club, but I poured an entire bottle of laxativs onto the pizza and they were unable to leave the toilets for two hours" the Master replied with a grin.

"You just love winding Jack up don't you?" Ten asked in a annoyed tone. The Master grinned and nodded as Ten buried his face in his hands.

Coming up next, the snowy weather hits London and the timelords decide to go out in it and have a snowball fight, that's to come next.


	18. The one with the snow

The one with the snow

It was around about eight in the evening and the four timelords where watching a movie on the tv which was just coming to the end.

"So let me get this straight, the bad guy was actually the good guys father?" the Master asked with a puzzled expression.

"Haven't you ever seen the empire strikes back?" Ten asked. The Master shook his head and pointed out he was far too busy being evil and plotting to take over the entire universe than watching movies. Just then, the weather forecast came up on the tv and the weather man pointed out that England will be expecting at least fourteen inches of snow during the day and possibly throughout the whole week.

"Oh great" Nine muttered sarcasticly. He was in a foul mood because the Master decided to put a hedgehog in his bed the night before after he found it hibernating in the bushes round the back of the apartments. Eleven however was excited about it snowing and even the Master seemed hyped up abut it too as well as Ten.

"Ok, plan for tomorrow,I suggest we all have a snowball fight" Ten suggested "now I want it to be safe and I don't want any ginat snowballs rolling down a hill."

"Hey, shall we clap and see if it causes an avolanche?" the Master suggested "I would love to see that." Ten then told him that it would be impossible to cause an avolanche in England because they only occur in places like Alaska or the Alps.

"I don't really see the point of snowball fights anyway" Nine said "it's bloody cold, gives you frost bite and I am having nothing to do with it."

"Well, what are you going to do then, big ears?" the Master asked as he leaned over Nine "are you going to sit around here being all emo while the three of us go outside and throw snowballs at each other."

"I'll still come out, i'll just sit there and read the newspaper. I am not joining in with the snowball fight and if I get one in my face, I will be very very angry" he declared. The Master pretented to look scared before giggling and walking off, leaving Nine to finish reading his magazine.

The next morning, the timelords looked out the window to see that it had been snowing overnight and was still snowing.

"So, are we going to have this snowball fight that you suggested then?" Eleven asked during breakfast that morning "because, it sounds cool."

"Yeah, we need to get well wrapped up though because it's going to be cold outside" Ten pointed out.

"Baby it's cold outsiiiiiide" the Master sang before giggling and getting some odd looks from the three doctors before Ten continued to speak about what he had planned out for the whole day before they all got ready to go out and have the ultimate snowball fight.

"Ok, well I'm just going to get something and I'll catch up with you guys" the Master said before going into his room.

"Ok, shall we get going" Ten said as he got the snow sleds out of the cupboard "it's nsowball fight time."

"Tell me, if we're having a snowball fight, then why on earth have you got snow sleds out?" Nine asked. Ten pointed out that they could do some sledding aswell as snowball fighting before they set off to a hilly area round the back of the apartment.

"Ok, we just need to wait for the Master to arrive and then we can get started" Ten said just as a large snowball flew past him and hit a nearby tree. The Doctors looked to see the Master stood at the top of the hill, with a medieval catapult and loading a second batch of snow into it.

"Ok everbody, this one is the big one" the Master shouted before firing the second giant snowball at the Doctors who jumped out of the way in time. After they pulled themselves off the ground and dusted the snow off themselves, Ten asked the Master where he had got the catapult from because he couldn't remember them having one in the apartment.

"Oh well that's easy, you see, while you three where making your way up here, I borrowed the tardis to travel to the medieval times and I sort of borrowed this catapult, well when I say borrowed, I stole it" the Master explained before launching the third giant snowball and this one landed on top of Nine.

"So, you stole a Medieval catapult so you can launch snowballs?" Ten asked as Nine sat up and attempted to brush off the huge amounts of snow " wouldn't it be easier to just throw regualr snowballs?"

"Boring" the Master replied with a fake yawn "anyway, I think giant snowballs are much more better."

"So did anyone see you taking the catapult then?" Eleven asked.

"Yes, a bunch of angry greeks who started chasing after me, waving their swords and shouting in a language I couldn't make out, but I managed to get away" the Master replied, feeling pleased with himself when he suddenly got hit with a snow ball "ok, who did that because whoever did that is going to suffer the wrath of the Master." He then scanned the three Doctors, trying to find who the culprit was, but none of them owned up so he walked towards them.

"Ok, I know one of you threw that snowball so fess up" he said "come on, I know it was one of you three because there's no one else around." It wasn't long before one of the Doctors owned up about throwing the snowball and it tunred out to Nine.

"So, you are willing to have a snowball fight then?" the Master asked "ok then big ears, lt the battle of the snowballs commence." He then walked back to the Medieval catapult as the Doctors formed a circle to discuss their battle plans.

"Ok" Whipsered Ten "I say we all take him on, three against one." Another giant snowball landed in the middle of their circle and they could hear the Master laughing manically at them.

"Are you three actually going to have this snowball fight or are you going to have a secret circle meeting?" he asked the Doctors who all turned to face him, snowballs at the ready "ok, I see you are ready to fight." He then pulled the lever on the catapult, ready to fire his next large snowball when he was bombarded by several small snowballs before he got a chance to launch his giant snowball and could clearly see that the Doctors were getting ready to launch their second batch of snowballs but the Master was ready this time and before the Doctors could throw their snowballs, he pulled the lever again and the giant snowball went flying through the air, landing on Ten this time, knocking him off his feet. The Master clapped in amusement and made his way toward the other three as Ten pulled himself to his feet, covered from head to toe in snow and was spitting some from his mouth.

"I think that's enough snowball fighting for one day, let's do something else" said Ten as he proceeded to wipe the snow off him. later that morning, Nine was sat on a deck chair, reading the newspaper while Ten was trying to stop the Master from putting someone's pet cat in the catapult and launching it.

"But cats always land on their feet" the Master pointed out as he put the cat in the catapult and launched it before laughing hysterically as the cat flew through the air and landed a few feet away, unhurt before climbing a tree. Meanwhile, Eleven was exploring when he saw a pole covered in ice so he walked up to it because he was feeling curious and wanted to see if the ice tasted like it did on ice lollies so he stuck out his tongue and stuck it to the pole but he soon regretted doing so because he was now stuck and no matter how hard he tried to pull himself free, his tongue wouldn't budge so now he was stuck there until one of the others would come and notice him.

Whilst Eleven was still stuck to the pole by his tongue, Nine was still sat in his deck chair reading his paper, Ten was making patterns in the shop with a stick and the Master was trying to climb up the tree that the cat had climbed up because he was trying to get it.

"Can't you leave that poor cat alone?" Ten asked.

"I want to make it fly again" the Master replied as he tried to coax the cat down "maybe I'll give it some red bull and see if it grows wings." Nine then realized that Eleven had been gone for quite a while and suggested that they go and look for him, see what he was doing. When they eventually found him, they saw that he was stuck to a pole by his tongue so they all ran to him and asked him what happened.

"A gat stack" Eleven replied "ya gat ta halp ma ma tangue as cald and a thank as gaing ta drap aff."

"Ok just keep still and we'll pull you off" said Ten "how did you manage tog et yourself stuck anyway?"

"A lacked tha pale and a gat stack" Eleven replied. Ten then turned to the other two and told them that they had to hold on to each other so they could all pull Eleven off the pole so they did so and yanked Eleven away from the pole but the force had sent them all tumbling to the ground.

"Woah, that's much better" said Eleven as they all stood up and brushed the snow off them "guess i won't be doing that again."

"Oh I wish I had the camera with me becuase I could have filmed it and then uploaded it to youtube" the Master said in amusement "I've still got that one where Nine was being attacked by the seagull that time we went to Blackpool." After the pole inicident, the timelords decided it was time to call it a day so they went back to their apartment and when they got back, they all flopped out on the sofa.

"Well that was an eventful day" said Eleven.

"Tell me about it" said Nine.

"Hey, you didn't do anything grumpy, you just sat in that deckchair all day, reading that bloody newspaper" the Master pointed out. Nine glared at him in annoyance and announced he was going to stay in his room for the rest of the night.

"I think we should all call it a day, it has been pretty hectic" Ten suggested. After they had all gone to bed, the Master, being the crafty bugger that he is, snuck out and came back a few minutes later with the cat that he had catapulted earlier.

"Ok moggy, let's see if this will make you fly" he said, whipping out a can of red bull,putting it near the cats mouth and saying "ok cat, drink it."

Coming up next, the timelords decide to decorate the apartment and they have to go out and buy a christmas tree, that's all to come next.


	19. The one with the Christmas tree

The one with the Christmas tree

It had been a week since the four timelords had gone out to muck around in the snow and the weather hadn't changed since then as it was still snowing and it was getting towards Christmas time, so they decided to decorate the apartment and make it look really Christmassy.

"Where do you want these ornaments?" Nine asked as he entered the front room, carrying a box of Christmas ornaments.

"Oh, you can put them on the shelf" Ten replied as he sprayed some fake snow on the windows "where's the Master and Eleven anyway, haven't seen those two all morning."

"They're in the Master's room and they've been making a den since six o clock this morning" Nine replied as he placed the christmas ornaments on the shelf. Ten nodded and went into the Master's room to find a huge den built with blankets, cardboard boxes and pillows in the middle of the room.

"Eleven, Master, are you both in there?" Ten asked, standing in front of the den.

"No, this is the Eleventh Dentist and the Mistress, we are evil spirits that have killed your friends and taken over their forms" The Master replied, poking his head out.

"Is that sarcasm I can sense?" Ten replied "anyway, we're putting the Christmas decorations, I would really appreciate it if both of you could help out." Eleven then poked his head out with a huge grin on his face and bounded out the den, causing it to collaspe.

"Hey, you've just destroyed my secret lair" the Master complained "the place where I was going to come and do some plotting for evil stuff.

"Ok then why did you allow me to help you built your secret lair then?" Eleven asked with a grin.

"I was planning on making you my sidekick" the Master replied "oh well, guess we could build it up again."

"Maybe later, we need to focus on decorating the Apartment first " Ten replied. About an hour later, the whole apaerment had been decorated with tinsel, various Christmas decorations and Chrismtas ornaments, but the one thing they realized whas that they didn't have a Christmas tree, not even a teeny tiny one.

"Now what are we going to do?" Eleven complained "you can't have Christmas without a Christmas tree." Nine and the Master nodded in agreement so Ten came up with the only solution to the problem and that was to go out and buy one. So the four of them headed down to the shopping centre to buy a Christmas tree.

"Hey, seeing as it's Christmas time, we should all sing some Christmas songs" the Master suggested before breaking out into song "it's that bloomin time of year again, where Santa rides on his bloomin sleigh to bring all the toys to the bloomin girls and boys, ho ho ho says santa as he rides upon his sleigh singing merrily, so jump up on Santa's sleigh and we're on our way, to another bloomin christmas." He giggled to himself before starting on the next Chrismtas song that he possibly made up.

"Jingle Bells, the Doctor smells, Captain Jack ate some dodgy bread, the Tardis mobile, lost it's wheel and the Master got away, hey." After going through about six more of the Master's made up Christmas songs, they finally arrived at the shopping centre and all four of them where shocked to see how busy it was.

"Holy Toclafane" the Master pointed out as he saw all the people, doing their Christmas shopping "it's really busy here."

"Well, it is that time of year, it will be busy" Ten pointed out "Ok, let's go and get our Christmas tree."

"And get the hell outta here" the Master added, putting on an American accent. As they fought their way through the crowds, they passed a man dressed up as Santa, ringing his bell and collecting money for Charity where the Master reversed back and yanked his fake beard off before catching up with the others. They had just nearly got the the Christmas shop when a extremely rude and ignorant old man barged past them without so much as an excuse me.

"My goodness, some people are so rude these days" Ten pointed out before tapping the old man on the shoulder "excuse me sir?." The old codger grumbled and turned around with a face like a smacked bottom.

"What do you want?" he grumbled "can't you see I'm in a hurry here."

"I am aware of that sir, but if you wanted to get past us, then a simple excuse me would be appropiate instead of knocking us out the way" Ten told him in a calm manner.

"I don't have time to say excuse me, now leave me alone you young folk" he said rudely before hobbling on his way. After their encounter with the rude old man, they continued on their way to the Christmas shop and when they finally got there, they saw the Christmas tree they wanted to get but it was going to be a problem because a man who was lurking near them, also had his eye on the tree they wanted.

"Ok, let's get our Tree and go" Ten told the other three as they went to get the tree, only to have their pathway blocked by the man who also wanted the tree they wanted.

"Excuse me sir, but is there a problem?" Ten asked.

"Yes, if you three idiots think you're getting that tree then forget it, that tree is mine" the man told them with a smirk.

"Hold old fella, but there's loads of trees in the shop, we saw that one first" the Master told him "so why don't you be on your way and give us access to that christmas tree." The three Doctors nodded in agreement, but the man was still refusing to move so Eleven tried to reason with him this time.

"Look, I'm pretty sure there's loads of that tree around the shop" he said, but the man was still being a douchebag.

"Ok, I think I know how we can settle this" the Master said, grabbing a trolley "how about a trolley dash, the first person to collect the most baubles, gets to buy the Christmas tree. Are you up for the challenge?"

"Ok" the man said, grabbing the next trolley "bring it on." So the Douchebag and the Master got their trolleys and did a trolley dash around the shop, collecting as much christmas baubles as they could and the one who collected the most baubles, get's the Christmas tree. After they had finished, the pair of them retunred to the start so they could count the baubles and see who collected the most.

"Ok, I'll count them " Eleven offered as he started counting the baubles that the Master had in his trolley before counting the ones the rotten douchebag who wouldn't let them get their Christmas tree had collected "oh, looks like the Master has collected the most baubles, so that means we get the tree." The four Timelords high fived each other and the douchebag kicked his trolley in a stroppy manner before sulking and heading out of the shop. After that little trolley dash, the four timelords got the tree they were after and made their way to the till to pay for it.

"What are we goign to do with all them baubles in those trolleys?" Eleven asked.

"Meh, just leave them, probably someone will buy both trolleys full of christmas baubles" the Master said as they left the shop with their new chrismtas tree. After they had got the tree, they decided to stop off at KFC for some lunch before proceeding to do abit more Christmas shopping.

"So, what do you think we should do for the holidays?" Eleven asked as they sat in the KFC restaurant.

"Well, seeing as it's our first Christmas in our Apartment,I think we should have a Christmas party, possibly a few days before Christmas" Ten suggested "we could invite the Mitchell family round and possibly Martha Jones and possibly Captain Jack. Then we could invite them back for Chrismtas dinner."

"So when are you planning on doing this Christmas party then?" Nine asked.

"Well, I was thinking the week before christmas, get into the festive mood" Ten suggested "then we could invite them for christmas dinner." After they finished their KFC, they went to get a few more Christmas stuff and some food for their Christmas party before deciding to head off back to the apartment so that they could put the tree up and decorate it and they passed the santa collecting money for charity again and the Master pulled his fake beard off again as they passed. When they arrived back at the apartment, they put the tree up in the corner of the living room before proceeding to decorate it with tinsel and baubles.

"Not a bad looking tree if I say so myself" Eleven said as he hung up the last bauble "I can't believe that guy wouldn't let us buy it because he wanted to buy it."

"Well he was a douchebag" the Master pointed out. After they had finished decorating the tree, the four of them sat in the kitchen, making discussion on the christmas party they'll be holding.

"Ok, we could place the food out like you would do in a buffet and allow people to help themselves and we could play some christmas tunes aswell" Ten suggested.

"I know, we could also play dares again, I could sent Nine to McDonalds and back, dressed as a Christmas elf" the Master suggested.

"Oh no you don't, I was still humiliated enough when you made me walk to Mcdonalds and back dressed as a fairy" Nine said in an annoyed tone "and I refuse to walk all the way to Mcdonalds and back in a stupid costume again. After some fair discussion about their Christmas party, the timelords decided to turn in for the night after a long day of decorating and shopping. They had been sleeping for about an hour when they were woken up by an almighty bang so they all rushed into the front room to see the douchebag from earlier, attempting to sneak away with their tree.

"What in the world are you doing?" Ten asked.

"Taking what is rightfully mine" the Douchebag replied "my Christmas tree." He then proceeded to leave but the Master blocked his path, holding a sweeping brush.

"Ok buddy, if you can just put the tree back where it was and leave then that would be most greatful" he said, tighting his grip on the sweeping brush. However, the Douchebag didn't put the tree back, he just stood where he was with an impatient look and waiting for the Master to move out the way so he could leave with their tree.

"Hang on, how did you know where we lived?" Ten asked.

"I followed you, then I waited until you all went to bed before climbing in through the window and the proceeding to steal your christmas tree which should have been mine" the Douchebag replied.

"But, I won that trolley dash fair and square buddy" the Master said "so put the tree down and leave the premises."

"No" the Douchebag replied with a smug look on his face.

"Well, I was hoping it wasn't going to come to this, but you leave me no choice" the Master said as he took out the laser screwdriver and pointed it at the Douchebag "now, unless you want to find out what this laser screwdriver can do to you, I suggest you put that tree back where it was and leave now." The Douchebag then reluctantly put the tree back in it's place and left the apartment without another word.

"Well, at least that's over with" the Master said "who does that fella think he is, breaking into our apartment and trying to steal our Christmas tree?"

"Maybe he couldn't accept that he lost the trolley dash" Nine pointed out. After the little incident with the Douchebag tryign to steal their tree, the Timelords went back to bed, hoping that nothign else would happen.

Coming up next, the Timelords host a Christmas party to celebrate their first Christmas in the apartment, that's all to come next.


	20. The one with the christmas party

The one with the Christmas party

Today was the day of the Christmas party and Ten had just finished laying the table out with party food wile the other three were blowing up balloons then letting them go all over the place.

"So, who do you thinks coming then?" Eleven asked as the Master let out the air from one of the ballons, causing it to fly around the apartment and land on Nine's head.

"Well the Mitchells said they're coming, I think Captain Jack and Martha are coming too. That's all I know so far" Ten replied before finishing icing the biscuits "ok, we've got over an hour before everyone starts arriving so we need to make this place look more presentable." The Timelords then began giving the Apartment a tidy before waiting for the party guests to arrive for the Christmas party.

"So, are we inviting them back again on Christmas day for Christmas dinner?" Eleven asked and Ten nodded, saying that he thought it would be a good idea to have this party and then invite whoever comes back for Christmas dinner too. After about an hour of waiting, the Mitchell family arrived then after them it was Captain Jack and Gwen Copper followed my Martha Jones, Sarah Jane Smith accompanied by her two Children, Luke and Sky along with Rani and Clyde. After everyone had arrived, the party began and it didn't take long for it to get lively.

"So, what might you're name be?" Captain Jack asked Denise in a flirting manner, only to be interrupted by James.

"Her name is Denise and I'm her Husband James" James said, sounding a little annoyed that another man was flirting with his wife "and we have two daughters aged Ten and Eight so I would really appreciate it if you didn't flirt with her."

"I am so sorry" Captain Jack replied before wondering over to the food table to see what was on it and Sarah Jane's daughter Sky had befriended Charlene and Emily plus the Master was continuessly annoying Martha.

"So, is that a pineapple on your head, oh no, it's your hair" he said, referring to her ponytail "hey, Martha there's some mistletoe over there, how about you and the Doctor with the spiky hair stand under there for a little kissy kissy." The Master then started making kissing noises but Martha ignored him and walked off.

"Oh you're no fun anyway" the Master called after her before going to annoy Nine who was attempting to get to the mince pies.

"I am not interested in being annoyed so can you please stop annoying me" Nine said as the Master placed his hands over his eyes and Charlene, Sky and Emily watched giggling.

"How do you know it's me?" the Master asked "it might not be me."

"Because I recognize your voice now take your hands away from my eyes at once" Nine said and the Master did so before going to explore the food table.

Meanwhile, Ten was talking to Captain Jack about tv shows when there was a knock at the door.

"I wonder who that could be" Ten wondered.

"I'll get it" Eleven said as he walked to the door to answer it and when he opened the door, there stood River song, holding some mistletoe abover her head.

"Erm.. hi" Eleven said awkardly, knowing that there were other people in the apartment and he blushed slightly.

"Hello sweetie" River replied before grabbing him by the lapels of his jacket, pulling him to her and giving him a kiss under the mistletoe.

"Way-hey, go on Eleven" the Master said as he had seen it "you lucky bugger." After she had given him a kiss, River walked into the flat and Captain Jack walked over to her.

"Hi there, Captain Jack harkness and who are you?" he asked in his flirtiarious manner and cheeky grin.

"Well my birth name is Melody pond but alot of people call me River song" River said just as Ten appeared behind them.

"Hello you" River said, pulling Ten in for a kiss as Jack looked on in dissapointment "sorry I'm late, had abit of trouble finding the apartment but when I heard the music and noise coming this apartment, I knew this was the place." She then got up and started having a wonder around the apartment whilst the Master was teasing Eleven about the kiss.

"So, who is the lucky lady then?" he asked "bet you wasn't expecting that, to open the door to a lady who kisses you straight away."

"Her name is River song and I think she has a crush on me" Eleven replied.

"Well, that didn't look like a crush to me" the Master replied before bursting into song " River and Eleven sitting in a tree, k-i-s-s-i-n-g, first comes love, then comes marriage and then comes Eleven with a baby in the a carriage." Eleven rolled his eyes and walked off and River was now talking to Nine and he was quite suprised to see that she had kissed his two furture incarnations.

"Well I could give you one if you like and you won't feel left out" River said in a flirting manner and before Nine could react, she gave him a kiss on the lips before walking off to the food table. A few hours had passed by and the party had gotten more lively which resulted in the grouchy old man who lived in the apartment below to come banging on the door to tell them to stop the party at once.

"Hey hey my good friend, you do not own this apartment and we have every right to be as loud as we can" the Master told him in a druken manner, only to be hauled back inside by Ten.

"I 'm sorry about him, had abit too much eggnog" Ten told the grouchy old man.

"I demand that you stop this party right now, that is an order" he barked.

"But, it is our apartment and if we want to have a party, we can do" Ten replied, trying so hard not to lose his temper but the grouchy old man barged into the apartment and turned off the music.

"Right, this party is now over and if I hear this blasted party started up again, I will call the police" he barked at everyone.

"Hey, man, you didn't have any right to do that" the Master said in a drunk voice.

"Kills me to say it but the Master's right" Nine replied "you can't just barge in here and stop our party, who the hell do you think you are?"

"I am trying to watch a tv programme in my apartment and I can hardly hear it because of the horrendous racket coming from above me" he snarled.

"We're just having a Christmas party that's all" Ten said "now I would really appreciate it if you let us carry on with our party and stop acting like you own this apartment." The old man hoiwever refused to allow them to continue on with the party and threatened to call the police if he so much as heard one Chrismtas song before leaving the apartment.

"So long Scrooge" the Master called out with a wave before turning to the others "don't just stand there, get the music back on, don't pay attention to what that old git says." Eleven nodded and put the music back on so they could continue on with the party but the old man never came back and when the party came to an end, everyone went home and River let with giving the three Doctors a kiss each. After everyone had left, the three Doctors gave the apartment a quick tidy but the Master was drunk again and he was sat on the sofa, babbling away.

"You know, I cannot wait until it's Christmas day, we could all dress up in santa costumes or one of us could be santa and the other three can be elves" he slurred "now wouldn't that be interesting, I hope I get a cannon for Christmas, I could open fire on the Daleks if they come down from the sky, kapow, take that you giant pepperpots from hell, hahahaha."

"Let's hide the eggnog from him on Christmas day" Nine whispered "he's only had two glasses and he's hammered." Ten nodded in agreement and attempted to drag the troublesome timelord from the sofa but he resfused to budge.

"I don't want to leave this sofa, it's too comfortable" the Master slurred "I think I might crash on it tonight." He then slumped across the sofa and began to snore so the other three just left him there and went to bed.

Coming up next, it's Christmas day at the timelords Apartment and they invite their friends over for the day, that's all to come next.


	21. The christmas special

The Christmas special

It was Christmas eve and the four timelords where getting things prepared for tomorrow because it would be hectic with the guests from the party coming back for Christmas dinner and Nine was being he usually grumpy self because the old man who tried to force them to stop the party had refused him access to the elevators because they were for old people only.

"You know what, I really feel like complaining about that old man, he thinks he runs the building" Nine pointed out "first he tries to make us stop our party and now he didn't let me use the elevator."

"Hey, do you remember the time we got stuck in the elevator for about three hours and we had to climb up the cables" the Master said with an amused expression whilst Nine huffed and sulked.

"Don't remind me" he grumbled. Meanwhile, Ten was baking some Christmas cookies and Eleven was helping him out like he did on Halloween, by checking the oven.

"How long until the first batch are done?" Ten asked as he poured the flour into the bowl to make the second batch. Eleven stated that the first batch would be ready in about ten minutes before heading to the cupboard to get the icing sugar just as the Master entered the kitchen and looked over Ten's shoulder to see what he was doing.

"What are you making?" he asked.

"Christmas cookies" Ten replied as he concentrated on what he was doing.

"Are you going to leave them out for Santa claus with a glass of milk like the kids do?" the Master asked.

"Maybe" Ten replied, not looking up from what he was doing. The Master then pointed out that Santa was fat because of all the cookies he eats when children leave them out for him on Christmas.

"I'm a little busy here if you don't mind" Ten said as he concentrated.

"Suit yourself" the Master replied before sauntering out of the kitchen and into the front room where Nine was flicking through the channels with a bored expression on his face.

"Anything good on?" the Master asked as he sat down next to Nine who shook his head and said there wasn't anything remotely interesting on, just some old fashioned Christmas movies from possibly the 1930s and he put the remote down on the coffee table with a bored sigh before deciding he was going to help Ten and Eleven with the baking.

"Wow, you must be bored" the Master said with an amused expression "oh well, seeing as everyone else is baking, I'll join in aswell and possibly make a big mess." Later that evening, Eleven was putting some Christmas cookies on a plate and placed them on the coffee table with a glass of milk and Nine asked him what he was doing.

"Leaving them out for Santa" Eleven replied with a grin. Nine rolled his eyes and announced he was going to bed. The other three stayed up for another couple of hours before finally going to bed themselves and about half an hour later, the Master crept towards the presents and hid them all in the cupboard before going back into his room.

The next morning, Eleven who was too excited to sleep any longer, bounded into the front room like a child and rushed towards the Christmas tree but became disappointed to discover that there were no presents there.

"No way" he moaned just as the other three arrived to see that all the presents were gone and Ten was puzzled because he could have sworn that he had put them there the night before.

"Looks like the Grinch paid us a visit last night" the Master suggested as he tried not to laugh as Eleven looked around to see if they were hidden anywhere but couldn't find them so he went into the kitchen to make a coffee and as he opened the kitchen cupboard, a bunch of coloured boxes all came tumbling out , causing Eleven to fall to the floor.

"I have found the presents" he called from underneath the pile of presents before pulling himself up off the floor and walking back into the front room.

"How on earth did they end up in there?" Ten asked with a puzzled expression as the Master burst out laughing hysterically and the other three all turned to look at him suspicioulsy.

"Do you have something to do with this?" Ten asked suspicioulsy "is this one of your pranks that you've pulled off?." The Master nodded with a grin and pointed out that he was just playing a christmas joke on them.

"Right well at least we can now open our presents" said Ten before heading into the kitchen to bring them back into the living room. Soon after all the presents had been opened, Ten was getting things prepared for the Christmas dinner, Nine was building up a 3-D Jigsaw puzzle and the Master and Eleven were competing against each other on Mario kart on the Wii.

"I'm in first place" Eleven yelled "I'm gonna win."

"You wish" the Master replied before over taking Eleven "ha ha, take that Luigi."

"Alright, this means war" Eleven said in a menacing voice, eyes narrowed before going at full speed.

"Hey that's not fair" the Master complained as Eleven over took him "you may have won this round but the next round is mine."

"Will you two be quiet, I'm trying to concentrate here" Nine told them in a rather annoyed tone as he attempted to finish his 3-D jigsaw puzzle.

"Sorry Niney, but this is some serious game playing me and Eleven are doing and we don't have time to be quiet" the Master replied, eyes still fixed on the tv screen. Nine rolled his eyes and continued to built his jigsaw but was now finding it hard to concentrate with the shouting coming from the two timelords who were playing on the Wii so he basically gave up and decided he would try again later. About an hour later, the people who came to the Christmas party had arrived for the Christmas dinner, the Master and Eleven were still competing against each other on Mario kart until Eleven got bored of playing and decided to help Ten with the Dinner.

"Happy Christmas sweetie" River said as she held a mistletoe over them and planted a big kiss on him "come on then, shall we help your previous incarnation with the dinner." Back in the front room, the Master was still playing on Mario Kart but now he had Charlene, Emily and Sarah Jane's daughter Sky competing against him.

"Come on you pathetic mushroom" the Master yelled at the tv "it's a really fast vechile you should be able to overtake Bowser." The three girls giggled at him and Charlene managed to overtake Emily who jokingly declared revenge upon her older sister. Meanwhile, in the kitchen, Ten, Eleven and River where busy getting the christmas dinner ready and Ten kept telling her that she was a guest and that she didn't have to help out.

"Oh I don't mind helping out my two sweeties" River said before kissing the two doctors "right, shall I go check on the turkey?." A couple of hours later, everyone in the flat was sat around the table, tucking into Christmas dinner.

"This is really good, I really like the turkey" Emily said "last year, my daddy burnt the christmas dinner so we had to have ham sandwiches instead."

"Really?" Ten asked the eight year old girl "and how did he manage to do that then?."

"Because he drank loads of beer" Emily said "he was always drinking last christmas and mummy had to send him to a special hospital to help him get better and when he came out, he didn't drink again." James was shocked when Emily started talking about his incident with the Chrismtas dinner last year and told her not to talk about it anymore.

"But it's true though, mummy told you to watch the dinner while she helped me and Charlene set up the dancemat but you started drinking about ten bottles of beer, fell asleep on the sofa and forgot about the Christmas dinner" Emily protested.

"Yes thankyou that's enough now Emily" James told his youngest daughter. The little girl nodded and continued to eat her Christmas dinner while Eleven was quite annoyed that he had sprouts because he didn't like them so he sneakly slipped them into the dustbin which was next to him and pretented that he was eating them.

After Christmas dinner had finished, everyone had gathered into the front room to sing some Chrismtas songs before playing some Christmas games.

"Ok ok, we have our first game coming up is called pin the nose on rudolph so everyone put on their blind folds while rudolph comes out" Ten told everyone before they put on their blindfolds and Nine emerged from his room, dressed as a reindeer.

"I don't know why I even agreed to do this?" Nine whispered in a rather annoyed tone.

"It's just abit of fun" Ten whispered back "just play along and you'll be fine." He then placed Nine in the middle of the room and the first person to have a go was Eleven and the Master was giving him the directions on where to put the nose, delibratly trying to get him to stick it on his foot.

"Master, you are not supposed to give the player directions" Ten told him "so can you please stop doing that." Unfortunatly, Eleven had stuck the nose on Nine's foot and he was now holding his foot whilst hopping around in pain.

"Ok, shall we have the next person" Ten said after Nine had finished hopping around. Later in the day, everyone was now going home and River was determined to get one more kiss from Eleven underneath the mistletoe, so she grabbed him by the lapels of his jacket and planted one big sloppy kiss on his lips before wishing him a very merry Chrismtas and then leaving.

"Ooooooooh, she really likes you" the Master told him "just wait until easter, shell probably bring you a large easter egg saying something like, happy easter my snuggly bunny bun bun sweetcheeks." Eleven blushed in embarresement and pointed out that he was going to have another go on Mario Kart.

"Ok well I'm playing aswell" the Master said "and this time, I will win on all rounds. Oi, Nine and Ten, fancy a game of Mario kart." Both Nine and Ten nodded and pretty soon, the four timelords were competing agaisnt each other on Mario kart whilst singing Chrismtas carols.

"Dashing through the snow, on a one horse open sleigh, over the fields we go, laughing all the way, bells on bob tails rings, making spirit fly, want fun it is to laugh and sing on a sleigh and song tonight" they all sang.

"Hit it" Ten called out.

"Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way, oh waht fun it is to ride on a one horse open sleigh, hey, jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way, oh what fun it is to ride on one horse open sleigh" all four of them sang cheerfully until the Master started adding his own lyrics, all to which were pretty innapropriate.

"I don't think anyone would be blinded if they saw rudolph's nose" Ten pointed out.

"But it's so damn bright, if he ever came right up to you with his nose you will be blinded" the Master protested. After spending a good couple of hours on the Wii, the four timelords decided to turn in for the night.

"Hey just think you guys, in a couple of weeks we'll be in the new year" Eleven said.

"Yeah, it doesn't seem two minutes since we first moved here" Ten replied.

"Oh when me and Nine got stuck in the elevator for about two hours" the Master said with a grin "and we climbed up the cables to get out." Nine sighed in annoyance and told the Master not to mention that ever again because it was the worst experience he had ever had before they all went to bed.

Coming next, the timelords take part in sports day at the local part along with many other residents of london, that's all to come next.


End file.
